Category: faith

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What If Your Child Doesn’t Like the Gender GOD Gave Them?

Disclaimer: I acknowledge the fact that this article may be incredibly offensive to some, even those that I call friends. However, this article is in NO way saying that I hate transgender/homosexual people. I love and respect them as humans (and friends!), I just simply don’t support their decision. I want to freely express my views and this article happens to hold a view that has recently been quite controversial in American culture.

You are a parent who loves the LORD and seeks to obey Him in all things, and you raise your children to do the same (Deut 6:6-7). What happens though, when your child tells you that they do not like the gender that GOD gave them? Do you accept them as they are to avoid possibly ostracizing yourself from your child’s life, or do you call the fires of heaven upon them because their dislike of their gender will lead them away from GOD’S truth?

You’re going to have to just pause and really listen to your child. Ask them questions. Hear what they have to say about what they are feeling and believing. You need to remember that you remain an example for your child- if you, a Believer, chooses to speak rashly and say the first things that come to mind (which will most likely be negative) to your child, then you stand a greater chance of losing them. James 1:19 says: So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of GOD. You need to readily listen to your child, you must choose your words carefully and you cannot afford to get angry. After all, you are an ambassador of Christ (2 Cor 5:20), you cannot misrepresent Him.

If anything, be angry at Satan- he is the one influencing your child. Am I saying that your child is possessed and needs an exorcism? No, but you do need to be sensitive to the situation. Satan wants to lead your child away- he seeks to pollute every creation of GOD. Think about it for a moment: why on earth would GOD have your child be born male/female, and then, a few years later when they are able to give voice to their feelings, they believe that they should have been something other than what they are? Do you not know that Satan is a deceiver? Do you understand that all he wants is your destruction? What better way to cause destruction than to separate you from GOD? The Scriptures say this about our adversary: Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8). Our Heavenly Father will continue to love your child- His love is not dependent on who you are, but who He is- but if they do not realize that being transgender goes against GOD, then they will be lost (it doesn’t have to be permanent).

Our feelings are not reliable, in fact, they can often lead us astray. You may find your child saying: “I don’t feel female, I should have been a male” and vice versa. Once their feelings and thoughts are strong enough and most likely justified by society, then they start to believe that they should be female/male. What makes them feel this way? Let me create a scenario for you: one day you wake up, and a sudden thought just pops into your head. The thought is that you find your neighbor annoying. You didn’t find him annoying yesterday, but you do today. You start to think of all the things that annoy you about your neighbor: he doesn’t close his car door properly, he sometimes talks while chewing gum etc. Now you’re working yourself up with all of these thoughts and feelings, but you have not even stopped to question them. You walk out of your house with these feelings swirling about in you and lo and behold, you see him doing the very things that you find annoying. Now you feel angry at him- why can’t he just shut his car door properly? Why doesn’t he just spit that gum out before talking to people? Doesn’t he know that it’s rude? You’re quite worked up now. The neighbor sees you and waves at you with a smile on his face. Oh, but you’re angry, so you glare at him and storm back into the house, banging the door closed behind you. The neighbor is naturally taken aback by your reaction to his friendly greeting- you were not like this yesterday! One day GOD tells you to speak to your neighbor about Christ, but guess what? Your neighbor does not want to hear anything that you have to say about Jesus because of the way that you once acted towards him. Now you’re questioning yourself- why were you so annoyed with him? Why did you get so angry with him when you really don’t have a problem with him? Do you want to know what happened? You didn’t filter your thoughts! You didn’t stop to think: is this thought mine? Or is it coming from somewhere else? You just accepted that you felt annoyed with your neighbor and then like a wildfire, it got out of control. You took it to another level. Do you know that Satan can put thoughts into your head? He cannot read your thoughts, but he can plant a thought in your mind. Why do you think we were given this Scripture: …casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ (2 Cor 10:5). Jesus said to love your neighbor right? How were you showing love when you chose to accept that negative thought and so treat your neighbor poorly? Do you understand how your thoughts exalted themselves against the knowledge of GOD? By accepting those thoughts and acting out your feelings, you disobeyed GOD and you gave Satan a stronghold in your mind (see 2 Cor 10:4). He planted a thought in your head and sat back to watch you run with it- you did all the work of disobeying GOD.

Let’s use this knowledge to now figure out what is going on with your child.

A thought gets put into your child’s mind- they do not feel male/female. Obviously, they do not think that there is an outside spirit force trying to influence them, therefore they accept the thought as their own: ‘I thought it, therefore it must be mine’. Guess what happens now? Since your child accepted the thought, the devil now has a stronghold in your child’s mind. You see, there are spiritual laws that all spirits must abide by. When GOD tells us not to do something, it’s for a reason! It’s not just about controlling us! When we go against GOD, we give the devil legal ground to afflict us.

Now your child’s mind is the devil’s playground. He is going to continue to inject thoughts contrary to GOD’S Word into your child’s mind. When under such an onslaught, your child has no way of fighting it, not on their own. Eventually, your child will not only be influenced by thoughts alone, but the devil will purposefully put certain people in your child’s life that will convince them that it is okay to feel and believe that lie.

Transgender people say they were assigned a sex that isn’t true to who they are. They will even tell you that it’s not about sexual orientation, how they dress or even surgery. It’s about how they feel inside. Did you know that suicide attempts are significantly quite high for transgender people? In particular for those who went as far as to have a sex change op? Go and research it for yourself. Even such actions as cutting oneself and other activities aimed at bodily harm are reported among transgenders. Now, if they were so certain about what they feel they should be, then why would they want to harm themselves or commit suicide? Professionals will chime in and say that it is a psychological problem, which is partially right- it did start in the mind after all. So they will either seek to align their patient’s thoughts and feelings with their ‘true gender identity’ or prescribe the medication to deal with their troubling thoughts. Do you see how everything revolves around thoughts and feelings? The devil is a master manipulator- we can never know where his blows are going to come from. What is worrying is that his lies have become mainstream truths. This means that GOD’S Word becomes the lie (in their eyes), and all who go against these mainstream truths are hypocritical, judgemental, unloving and dangerous people to society. What a mess.

So what can you, the parent, do? If you cannot reason with your child by using Scripture, then they need to know that you love them unconditionally, but you do not accept them seeking to change their gender in any way. Now it’s time for you to kneel down before the LORD in earnest prayer. You are going to have to pray and use the Word of GOD as a weapon against the forces of evil. Didn’t Paul the Apostle say that we ‘…do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places’ (Eph 6:12)? You’re not fighting against your child or even against the people that are trying to influence him/her. No, your fight is against Satan and his demons. They are the ones that are taking your child away, not just from you but from GOD as well. They want your child’s soul, and the only way to get it is to be separated from GOD through sin. When you pray, make sure to fast as well (look to Isaiah 58 to find out what a fast should be like). Prayer, fasting and using GOD’S Word are our weapons against evil principalities- ‘…for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds…’ (2 Cor 10:4).

Some people might say that your child being transgender does not mean that they will be taken away from you, but those are just lies. Your child changes, not only physically (with the help of hormones, the sex op or clothes), but also in personality, beliefs, etc.

If you do not know where to start when using Scripture, read 2 Peter 3:9 and 1Timothy 2:4. These Scriptures tell us that God wants everyone to be saved- that’s the basis of your petition. In 1 John 5:14-15, it tells us that when we ask according to GOD’S will, then He will hear us and that we will have the petitions that we have asked of Him. That’s a promise!

Do not expect your child to change their minds overnight. Continue to pray and believe in GOD. It could take years, but your job is to continue to have faith in GOD and in His promises to us. Do not give up.

Ending Thoughts: The devil will most certainly try to deter you in any way that he can. His most powerful weapons against us are fear and doubt. Jesus has the victory (Col 2:15), so all he can do is try to get us to think contrary to GOD’S Word.

When in doubt, look to Luke 10:19 and Acts 16:31, and for fear, look to 2 Timothy 1:7. There are many other Scriptures that you can use, these are just the main ones that I use when I go into open warfare against the devil. Get deep into the Scriptures and study them. If you do not understand something, then ask GOD for wisdom according to James 1:5, but do not doubt, for if you doubt, do not expect to receive anything from GOD (James 1:6-8).

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Can Tithing Make You Rich?

Can Tithing Make You Rich?

When people speak about tithing it is divisive.  Some are for and  some are against  and usually, they’re both screaming at each other!

Most people would say it’s a con, a hoax, a joke etc. They say it’s no longer relevant and yet that wasn’t the case for me. When I was started tithing my life was in shambles.  In desperation, I went to God for an answer. Sometime later the answer came back  “start tithing.”

I’d like to say that I immediately took action, that I whipped out my checkbook and wrote my first check immediately.That I repented for my inactions. Nope.

I ignored the “answer” for some time. But after a while, I did start tithing. I did it as an experiment. I started tithing on unemployment checks and after some time I was tithing on a six-figure income.

The Benefits of Tithing

Now keep in mind I’m not going to tell you that if you tithe these things are going to happen:

  • Your debts are going to be paid.
  • Your mortgage is going to be forgiven.
  • Your car is going to transform into a brand new BMW.
  • The boss won’t be able to sleep until he gives you a raise.
  • The CEO of the company you’re working for will see your name and face in a dream, seek you out, and promote you to a position you have don’t the skills or experience for.

Not at all.

I will say that there are great benefits to tithing that cannot be ignored. But let’s start from a Biblical point of view…and no I don’t mean  Malachi 3:10!

1. The Bible

When the Bible speaks about the tithe it uses the Hebrew word “maaser”(pronounced mah-as-ayr‘). It’s used 32 times in the Old Testament.  (Note: English is read left to right, Hebrew is read right to left.) The Hebrew language is a language of root words. Prefixes and suffixes are added to build on the meaning of the root word. So in this word, the first letter mem (מ) conveys this meaning:

Changing a verb into the noun of that word:

For example: adding mem “to preach”  (verb) turns it into  “preacher” (noun).

Now taking away mem (מ)  from “maaser” we’re left with  “aser”  which means rich.

So another way of interpreting this is:

The “rich” is in the tithe.

or with “maaser”:

“The one tithing becomes rich.”

Whoa! Crazy, isn’t it?

2. State of the Plate

Let’ss look at some other other numbers: According to the landmark State of the Plate research – a multi-year research that documented the giving habits of thousands of givers –  Tithers were more financially stable than their counterparts:

According to the author:

“People that follow biblical principles of giving also are much more likely to be wiser and more careful in their spending”¦It is important in preaching and teaching on finances and generosity to help people realize that generosity leads to greater financial freedom and stability, while not giving frequently leads to greater indebtedness and financial bondage.”

Could it be possible that King Solomon – one of the wealthiest men who lived had a point when he said,  “Honor the Lord with your possessions, And with the firstfruits of all your increase; So your barns will be filled with plenty, And your vats will overflow with new wine.” (Proverbs 3:9-10 NKJV)  or  “There is one who scatters, yet increases more; And there is one who withholds more than is right, But it leads to poverty. The generous soul will be made rich, And he who waters will also be watered himself.” (Proverbs 11:24-25 NKJV)?

3. Chantel Ray

But there are even greater case studies about tithing. Before Chantel Ray. was a multi-million dollar real estate entrepreneur, she was a youth pastor making $9/hr.  She was also using credit cards to survive. After several years of this she was $10,000 in debt and her cards were maxed out. One day she heard about tithing. Like many of us she said, “Yeah right! I can’t do this right now. Maybe when I start making some money.” But after months of fighting things continued to get worse and she took the leap of faith. Her first tithe check was $30. The next day she received a refund check of $300. She continued to tithe and a close family member felt led to pay off her debt. She continued to tithe and within a few months, she got a better paying job.  She continued to tithe, in fact, she increased the amount. She began a new career in real estate, was the best salesperson, and eventually started her own firm.

4. John D. Rockefeller

But let’s look at another case study: John D. Rockefeller!  Before John D. Rockefeller became the richest American ever. Before his wealth was 1.5% to 2% of the U.S’s GDP  (his personal wealth $1.4 billion; the US GDP $92 billion). Before his philanthropy equated to  hundreds of millions of dollars (billion adjusted for inflation) he learned how to give at an early age. His giving began with his first job as a clerk at age 16, when he gave 6% of his earnings to charity. By the time he was twenty, his giving exceeded 10% percent of his income. Much of it going to church-related activities. Rockefeller, a devout Christian, was always under the belief his success was divinely inspired. He said, quite emphatically:

“God gave me my money.”

Why did God single him out for stupendous wealth? He believed it was because he was a good steward. In his seventies he said:

“It has seemed as if I was favored and got increase because the Lord knew I was going to turn it around and give it back.”

Conclusion

I do know this: no matter what I say the debate will always continue. There are always going to be people for tithing and people against tithing. I can live with that. But tithing helped change my life and I hope that one day you can “experiment” with it and see what happens to you. What have your experiences been with tithing?

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Troubled Heart, Take Refuge in God

Let Not Your Hearts Be Troubled

All around me are troubled hearts. It just seems that around every corner, in every news story, on social media, and in my small little burg hearts are broken, abused, and trampled. Are all of our prayer petitions for naught? Where is God?

Last night at my book club gathering at our local public library, a former student saw me and quickly came in for a big hug. Gosh, how they grow. I said, “You’re a senior now, right?” He told me he was and how he had plans to enters trade school in Nashville, Tennessee this fall. I was over the moon. You see, most of my students were minorities from severely impoverished homes. I preached setting goals, getting an education, and championing poverty. I, myself, was born in the government projects with a struggling mom, an alcoholic father, and four siblings. I so often felt like I was seeing a classroom full of me as I taught. I had figured out the code of breaking the cycle of poverty: God, education, and service. I held a precious key that I hoped they would accept. Sadly, not all of them do.

He then said, “Did you hear about DTay?” A shadow crossed his face. I said, “No, what’s up?” He lowered his head and eyes and replied, “They found him dead and beaten to death on Old Mill Road by the tracks down from the Eastside.” My heart crumpled within my chest. Only 18 years old and a life tragically ended. These things shouldn’t happen in rural, small towns in Tennessee like mine, but they do. It is a statistical fact. In the U.S., black males ages 15-34 number one killer is a homicide. My heart is troubled. We hugged again and I told him to get his education and my prayers were with him and all my students until my last breath.

This morning I opened my devotional to begin my day. The first verse was John 14:1 “Do not let your hearts be troubled.” I felt like Thomas. I’m lost and I do not know the way out of this mad, mad world that young men die so brutally and often. Let’s not forget cancer, addictions, the shrinking middle class, divorces, and abject poverty. Then I heard, “I am the way. I’m always with you. I’ve gone before you to create a better place. There are many rooms in my Father’s house.” I took a deep breath remembering my student. I know that those rooms are for lost youth, broken people with addictions, and those who struggle to eek by on this earth. My joy has always come from knowing God is for and with me. This isn’t our last stop. If you have a troubled heart today, I urge you to say a simple prayer, “God help me.” God is within those banged up hearts, just open your heart to Him.

 

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Who am I in Christ?

Who Does God Say That I Am?

Have you ever asked yourself, ‘Who am I really? It’s an age-old question that many people ask and some never figure it out, our identities seem to tie in to what we are to certain people and how we live our lives.

After growing up in a broken home, and spending some years in a foster home, I spent many years of my life trying to figure out who I was; really. Was I really someone’s child, someone that didn’t fight for me while I was in a foster home for years? In the foster home, I was not really a daughter, I was a foster kid. I didn’t really belong, it was a “temporary” home for years. I was another mouth to feed in the home. I became a wife at a young age and for many years that seemed to be my identity but deep down that never satisfied me.

I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a friend, even a patient.

All of my identities, everything that I believe I am, are all dependent on somebody and something else. Don’t get me wrong these are important roles in my life and I get to share my gifts and leave my mark in each of these lives but all of these are just roles in my life and are just a part of what makes me, me. What if all of these people were suddenly gone, what would be left of me? The question still plagues me, who am I?

Gifts and Talents

I believe my true identity goes much deeper than the just mere connection with someone else. God gives us all gifts and I soon realized that I could link up all of my gifts and talents in some way to my roles in my life. Character is the core of who you really are because when your back is up against the wall and you have no choice this is when your true self will show.

I am a good listener. Often times people call me to vent or to give them my opinion but most of the time I listen. People need that, they need for people to listen to them. Most everyone seems to be in a hurry these days and take very little time to slow down and listen. Listening comes easy for me.  Hebrews 2:1(ESV) says;

“We must pay the most careful attention, therefore, to what we  

have heard, so that we do not drift away.”

So, because of this scripture, I see God also wants me to be a good listener to Him as well.

I am  Loyal.  I am loyal to my husband, loyal to my children, loyal to my family even though at times they may try my patience. I am loyal to my Heavenly Father, I trust Him, serve Him, rely on Him and seek Him daily. Matthew 24: 45-46 (ESV) says;

“Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom his master  

has set over his household, to give them their (physical, and spiritual)  

food at the proper time?  Blessed is that servant whom his master  

will find so doing when he comes.”

I demonstrate my loyalty to God and loyalty to those who He has called me to serve.

I am trustworthy. I don’t gossip, I don’t tell someone else’s story if told something in confidence I keep it in confidence. I have learned to trust God and I believe He trusts me.

Psalm 91:2 (ESV) says;    

 “I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress:  

my God; in him will I trust.”

I am loving and kind.  I don’t just tell of my love for people, I do my best to show people that I love them and care for them. I try to have a shoulder for people to lean on. I do my best to express my concern for others situations and the things in life that they are going through. 1 Corinthians 13: 7 (ESV) says;

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,  

endures all things.”  

I am compassionate.  I can feel empathy for people, even if they don’t want it or deserve it in some people’s eye. I don’t want anyone to feel alone.

I also bear tangible gifts, I am an artist.  I love to draw.

I am a  musician: I play the guitar.

I am a blogger: I have been open about my health and life as well as my walk with God and how I believe completely in His word. 2 Timothy 1:8 (ESV) says;

“Therefore, do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord,  

nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by  

the power of God.”

I am a daughter of a King. Not perfect, I make mistakes, but I am a working towards being more and more like my Father every day. John 1: 12 says;

“But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he  

gave the right to become children of God,  13 who were born,  

not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man,  

but of God.”

Who am I?’ I am what God made me to be.

 

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6 Ways Laughter is Good for You

6 Ways Laughter is Good for You

It’s easy to get bogged down with the pain and suffering of the world. Life is hard, sometimes. No one is arguing that.  

But God also created us to dwell in joy!

Much evidence exists that God meant for us to laugh, to have fun, and to find ways to enjoy our lives. When God created our bodies, he made them in such a way that laughter is actually physically beneficial to us.

Laughter is a natural response to something that we find funny. Not only does laughter lighten our spirits, but it’s actually good for us physically as well.

Groucho Marx said, “A clown is like an aspirin.”

We’ve all heard the old adage, “Laughter is the best medicine.”

And while those quotes don’t exactly come directly from scripture, this proverb is pretty close:

“A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.” Proverbs 17:22

So what is it about laughter that is good for our bodies?

Laughter Increases Blood Flow and Respiration.

Do you ever laugh so hard that you feel like you can’t breathe? When this happens, the diaphragm muscles are engaged, respiration system is on overdrive, and blood flow to the brain is increased. All of these responses to laughter are actually good for the body.

Laughter Reduces Tension.

During laughter, muscles are tensed and tight. Afterwards, physical tension and stress is relieved and the body can benefit from that relaxation going forward for approximately 45 minutes.

Laughter Burns Calories.  

Looking for ways to lighten up on the scale? A good belly laugh can help you to lose a few ounces here or there. Plus, laughter may also have the residual effect of producing happiness that helps to minimize stress eating.

Laughter Reduces Pain.  

Giving a boost of feel-good chemicals (endorphins), laughter can actually reduce pain. Possibly like the aspirin to which Groucho Marx was referring?

Laughter Boosts the Immune System.

Cortisol and adrenalin are flight-or-flight hormones secreted during stress. Laughter can decrease these stress hormones and increase the cells that fight infections, improving your body’s ability to protect you from disease.

Laughter May Increase Life Span.

One study conducted in Norway has shown that people may actually live longer when they have a strong sense of humor. This may be particularly true for those who are fighting against cancer.

If your daily life doesn’t bring you as many funny moments as you need to really laugh, try being intentional about including laughter in your life. Sign up for a joke-a-day email. Subscribe to a funny YouTube channel. Keep a laughter journal so you can relive funny stories in your memory and bring up positive endorphins and laughter.

When all else fails, you can actually fake laugh. While it doesn’t have exactly the same results as real laughter, if you do it enough (especially with a friend) it can often turn into real laughter and provide numerous health benefits.

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Why Christianity Has Been Pushed Underground in China?

China's Christians Practice Their Faith in Underground Churches

Millions of Chinese identify themselves with Christianity a reality that President Xi’s administration is fighting hard against. The number has increased gradually and this is seen as a threat to the government which is officially atheist and its power is being put to test.

Under the presidency of Xi Jinping, the government launched a number of initiatives to control and at times limit Christian followers. Chinese Communist Party (C.C.P.) is up in arms to control and fight Christianity. The government constraints and controls religious freedom. Why is the government determined to rob people of their free will to worship?

We are blessed that we have the freedom of worship to our Lord anywhere, anytime and anyhow with no one monitoring of our doings unlike In China where Christians have been pushed to worship underground. China ranked 10th as a country where it is most hard and risky to practice Christianity according to Open Doors, a U.S. based Christian non-profit that traces the persecution of Christians worldwide.

The Lie

Psalms 103:2-3 says, Praise be to the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits-who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases.

The Chinese government has been persuading Christians to pull down the pictures of our Lord Jesus Christ and replace them with the photographs of president Xi Jinping.They have also gone ahead to tell them about how Jesus won’t drag them out of hardships or cure their ailments which we all know it’s a lie from the devil!

Our God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all we have asked for or imagined.

The Christianity crackdown

Over the past 4 decades, there has been a tremendous increase in Christian believers and this has not gone down so well with the government. The Chinese Communist Party is on guard lest Christians invade the country and that’s why they have opted to restrict and put a barrier to free worship. With the crackdown this is what they’ve opted to do against the Christians;

1. The Communist party was very daring in visiting Christians households in Jiangxi Province, removing by force dozens of Christian symbols and images of Jesus from their living rooms and substituting them with the communist president.

2. Bible online sellers like Amazon has been banned so as to suppress Christianity.

3.The government has destroyed churches under president Xi Jinping.The blowing up of the Christian megachurch with dynamite shows how the government has no respect for religious freedom or human rights.

4. Churches across the Zhejiang province were forced to remove their crosses and the government set new limitations that believers must have government approval.

5. Detention of believers, hindering entry to places of worship and interfering with gatherings has forced many Christians to go underground.

6. The Chinese government has actively and openly been popularizing Buddhism and Taoism, as well folk religions while restricting the spread of Christianity.

7. Preachers have also been coerced to show their loyalty to the communist party and have taken to applauding president Xi Jinping and combining party propaganda into their teachings.

8.The new law that took effect on February 2, 2018, says will charge penalties on organizers or unofficial religious happenings and stop them from basic duties like receiving handouts, providing spiritual information online, or teaching children.

9. The Chinese government has lifted up the presidential term limits-you guessed it right on what this means for the church. Lifting up the term limit is a way of allowing the Communist party to suppress the spread of Christianity.

This has forced many Christians to go underground and some members are reluctant to confess their faith. Forcing the removal of crosses from the churches where the preachers could not agree to it, they opted to go underground for the fear of further punishment.

Acts 1:8 says, but you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you, and you will be my witness in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.

“By 2030, China will almost certainly have more Christians than any other country and the Communist party is very alarmed.” Says Fenggang Yang.

With this power given unto us, we can change anything and even make things happen. Let us unite as Christians and pray for our brothers and sisters in China and every corner of the world where Christians are being attacked for practicing their faith.

As Christians, we are blessed to have the Holy Spirit to empower and give us power and authority. In countries where we have the freedom of worship, let’s spread the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ even to the unchurched.Share the word of God to everyone who cares to listen and save their souls from death.

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Pray Without Ceasing: What Does it Mean?

Pray Without Ceasing: What Does it Mean?

What does it mean to ‘pray without ceasing’? Is that even possible? Many Believers have asked this question, perplexed at the command- because that is what it is, a command. We know that we are to obey God in all things, so how can we possibly ‘pray without ceasing’?

I think that we can all agree that it is impossible to physically pray without ceasing. By physical I mean lifting your voice to the LORD in prayer, raising your hands to Him, getting down on your knees to pray- you get the picture. There is no way that we can physically do it because then we would never get anything done. You cannot attend a lecture and concentrate on what the lecturer is saying if you’re too busy praying, you would not be able to have a conversation with your spouse if you were deep in prayer, neither would you be able to attend parent meetings if all of your time was devoted to prayer. These are just a few things you wouldn’t be able to do- I’m sure that you could think of a hundred more other things, but you get the picture, right?

However, the words ‘without ceasing’ may not mean what you think. The Greek word for ‘without ceasing’ is adialeiptos. It doesn’t mean non-stop like we may assume, but it actually means ‘constantly recurring’. This changes things, doesn’t it? Instead of trying to pray constantly, all the time and all day, what we can do is interrupt our moments with intervals of recurring prayer. Perhaps this idea of recurring prayer still confuses you, so I’ll break it down even further.

Prayer should be a way of life for every Believer. We understand prayer to be an act of communication with our Father- we are essentially talking to Him and with Him. What is wonderful about praying to our Heavenly Father is that we can talk to Him about anything and we know that He will be listening. I believe that GOD wants us to involve Him in every aspect of our lives, whether you are traveling to work, trying to bake an elaborate birthday cake or hiking up some mountain. Think of Him as a parent (an all-powerful and all-knowing parent!); many of us enjoy telling our parents about what is going on in our lives. Some of you have parents that will call you every day just to find out what you’re up to! They do it because they love you, not to irritate you. Perhaps your parents are not as interested in your life, but GOD sure is. When He created us, He didn’t make one type of person, He didn’t give us the same type of personality, features or talents. He made us all different and unique, and He is interested in what we are doing with what He has given us. I’ll let you in on something: GOD loves spending time with you! So how do we punctuate our moments with intervals of recurring prayer?

We need to be continually in an act of prayer. For example, when we see a beautiful sunset, we should give thanks to the LORD for being able to witness such a thing. When you arrive safely at work, knowing that many others around the world have probably just died in an accident, you thank Him for His protection upon your life. Perhaps you’re writing an exam, so you speak to Him and ask Him to help you remember what you’ve studied. Do you get the picture? In so doing this, all of life’s thoughts, actions and circumstances become an opportunity for you to commune with your Heavenly Father. In this way, you constantly set your mind “on the things above, not on the things that are on earth“ (Col 3:2).

Let me take this one step further. From the Scriptures, we learn that we have a physical body, and we have a spiritual body. Let’s examine some Scripture pertaining to this: I pray GOD your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our LORD Jesus Christ (1 Thess 5:23), and, For the Word of GOD is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and the joints and marrow (body), and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart (Heb 4:12). To tell the truth, I get incredibly excited when I talk about this! We also know that there is a spiritual realm co-existing with the physical realm (I have firsthand knowledge of this). We know this because of the number of heavens spoken of in the Scriptures. Go and take a look for yourself- I urge everyone to not just take my word for everything stated in any of my articles but to search the Scriptures for yourselves.

This all brings me to this one Scripture: What am I to do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will pray with my mind also; I will sing praise with my spirit, but I will sing with my mind also (1 Cor 14:15). What on earth, Paul? Pray with your spirit? Oh yes! I firmly believe, that when you have studied the Word of GOD, memorised scriptures, living by faith and not by sight, depending on the Holy Spirit to guide you in all things, seeking GOD with your whole heart… then you will be more aware of your spirit body, but only under the control of the Holy Spirit. We should never ever seek to have control of our spirit bodies as those in the occult do. It’s what they call the third eye. By this eye, which is really your spiritual eyes, they can willfully see what is going on in the spiritual realm. Only GOD should allow you insight into the spiritual realm for His purposes. Make no mistake: being in control of your spirit body will lead you away from GOD. If you do have control over your spiritual body, I urge you to repent of that right away and to ask GOD for forgiveness, or at least seek Him on this; let Him reveal to you why it is so dangerous, but be careful that the father of lies (Satan) does not fool you either.

You can pray in the spirit- Paul would not have said it if it were not so. You may be walking about, talking to people etc., but your spirit can be praying. Just remember, your spirit can only know what you know, so make sure to study GOD’S Word and memorize Scripture.

Ending Thoughts: For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places (Eph 6:12). I cannot cover everything about our spirits, the spiritual world, our spiritual weapons etc all in one go- it’s too intensive for that. Let me tell you this though: events take place in the spiritual realm before they manifest in the physical realm. Remember to use the Word of GOD in your speech- the spiritual realm is waiting on your words.

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How Long Will I Be Allowed to Remain a Christian?

How Long Will I Be Allowed to Remain a Christian?

Following Douglas MacKinnon’s article, published April 21st, 2018, on the Fox News website, the former White House and Pentagon official, plus author, raised this very delicate question:

How long will I be allowed to remain a Christian?

This question sent me into a very complex journey.   M. MacKinnon, asks why do so many, not practice the very simple rule of “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.   It is regarding the fact the many Christian citizens of the United States are under the impression their faith is not respected. It has been ridiculed, diminished and attacked on a daily basis.

Will this persecution, Christian families face, eventually cause them to renounce their faith in order for them to keep their job so they can provide for their families?

What God says about keeping faith

Jesus told us if we were to believe in Him, we too would be persecuted. It is obvious that many suffer physically for being Christians, in different parts of the world. Many of us are free from physical persecution but still are suffering for our faith. But it is very important to recognize there is a big difference in the way we experience our faith depending on the area we actually live in this world.

1 Peter 2.23

When He was reviled and insulted, He did not revile or offer insult in return; when He was abused and suffered, He made not threats of vengeance; but He trusted Himself and everything, to Him Who judges fairly.

God knew we would struggle with unbelief because persecution often brings us to questioning our faith! But God shares many scriptures in the Bible to help us during those times.

1 Thessalonians 2:13

And we also thank God continually because when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as a HUMAN WORD, but as it actually is, the word of God, which is indeed at work in you who believe.

I took the time to ask a very good friend of mine, my pastor, what were his thoughts on that matter. Here’s what he said:

Persecution toward Christians is very edifying! You basically are a Christian or not. Persecution separates those who wish to follow the Lord and those who will eventually stop. It defines the Christian. It pushes him/her to make sincere and difficult choices.  

We become desperate during persecution time, but you also live incredible things with God through that! You bow down, kneel down and look to God.

Sometimes in our faith, we become very comfortable, indifferent or even complacent. We lose our thirst for God. But during times of persecution, it can bring us back to where we should be.   Our relationship becomes more intimate as we grow in our faith, as we are willing to accept suffering as a privilege.    

On a personal note, I was sick with C Difficile for many months and it brought me close to death, but it also made me realise how special of a relationship I have with our Father.   I felt at one point, lying on that hospital bed, there was just Him and me, staring at each other. He asked me one question: Do you still believe?

We know all the hardship will either make us stronger or we will lose our faith. We just can’t “believe” only when life is easy. But if we expect it -persecution, just like Jesus told us too, we can prepare for it.

We need not to forget that God intervenes during persecution. History shows us there are revivals and awakenings in different parts of the world, which has brought millions and millions of people to God when there was no hope left. (Beardsley, 1912)

Our God is not shaken by what might happen in the world or by what gets to be written in the newspaper even if it is a bit scary and sometimes, discouraging. Our God is strong. That’s why we need to rely on Him, look to Him only and read very carefully His words. Take courage in them. They will surely bring you peace when nothing else can.

-Smile.

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Hamilton and the Life Altering Power of Encouragement

Hamilton, An American Musical, at the Richard Rodgers Theatre

Can you remember a time when someone saw potential in you and called it out? A time that someone encouraged you, believed in you, and cast a vision for your future? These moments have the power to alter the entire direction of our lives.

In my upcoming book, God and: Spiritual Themes From the Life of Alexander Hamilton & the Broadway Musical He Inspired, I highlight different themes found in Hamilton that engage and challenge audiences in their own spiritual journey.

The first chapter from my book talks about the grace given to Alexander Hamilton when some local businessmen in the Caribbean read an essay he wrote, recognized the intellectual potential within Hamilton, and raised money to send him to America to get his education.

The resources given to Alexander represent a gift of grace that he could never have earned for himself. Everything that Hamilton would become in America was built on the foundation of this grace.

Recently, I recognized that an entirely different grace existed in this moment as well, in addition to the monetary gift. These businessmen offered a grace to Hamilton by encouraging him – by seeing the potential and calling that potential out of him.

I like to imagine the conversation between these businessmen and Alexander, and how deeply their words impacted him. Living as an impoverished orphan boy, with no one caring about him or his future, these words were quite possibly the most meaningful words ever spoken to him.

“Son, we read your essay. We see great potential in you.”

“Alexander, you have a rare intellectual gift. We want to help you develop that gift.”

“We expect great things from you Alexander. You are going to America. Never underestimate what you can accomplish there.”

I like to think that these words shaped Hamilton’s entire future. Certainly, the money given opened up a new world of possibility for Hamilton. But what if the words were spoken to him we just as important as the money donated? What if their belief in his potential inspired Hamilton’s belief in himself, and propelled him into his role in shaping our country?

God and Hamilton

The Book of Ephesians says that we should use our words “for building people up and meeting the need of the moment.” Never underestimate the power of your words. When you call potential out in someone else, your words contain the power to change the entire direction of someone’s life. Just like they did for Alexander Hamilton.

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Album Review: Andrew Serino – The Golden Thread

Andrew Serino - The Golden Thread

Partially paid for via crowdfunding website IndieGoGo, ‘The Golden Thread’ is Portland, Oregon singer-songwriter Andrew Serino’s first full-length album. An incredibly talented multi-instrumentalist and songwriter, Serino has been in bands for most of his life and made a name for himself on his local scene, as well as auditioning for American Idol. He plays every single instrument on the album, resulting in a time-consuming recording process that took many months to achieve. Now finalised and released, it’s an album that Serino has a right to be proud of, and will certainly get him some of the attention he deserves further afield from Portland.

‘Wake Up’ is essentially the opening track after the short ‘Introduction’ and it certainly sets us off with a bang. It’s a thumping, fist pumping post-hardcore/emo rocker that will sound familiar to fans of the likes of At The Drive-In, Fall Out Boy and Anberlin. “I know that feeling, believe me,” he admits in this catch and feel good song exploring the bad habits we can all easily find ourselves falling into, urging the listener to “wake up” and fight their way out of it, or even perhaps, to wake up and see the light!

Andrew Serino - The Golden Thread
Andrew Serino – The Golden Thread

Andrew Serino – The Golden Thread

‘Arrogance’ goes further down into the pop-punk style, as does ‘Broken Record’, which has the slick, modern feel of current Paramore and Panic! At The Disco, with yet another catchy chorus. Serino has said it’s “his version of a love song”, and it’s a track that could be taken at face value as an actual love song, or it could easily be a love song to God. It’s up to the listener to make up their mind and take from it what they will. Serino readily admits he’s like a broken record because of how often he talks about the subject of the song, declaring he “will try to find the tallest mountaintop just to prove what I’d do to show my love”.

Andrew Serino - The Golden Thread
Andrew Serino – The Golden Thread

‘Honestly’ is a stand out track, featuring an appearance from Justin Abel, who produced the record but has an excellent voice too! It’s got more of a metalcore/emo Pierce The Veil type feel, as does ‘Deal With It’, a fast-paced hard rocker.

“I’m not a perfect person, I’m not a perfect person man, I’m trying to stay humble and I do the best I can” Serino sings in the title track ‘The Golden Thread’ which finishes off the collection of twelve songs, before screaming, “don’t let me stay broken” in a desperate plea to God to help him. It’s heartening to see someone unafraid to expose their fears and imperfections in such a way, and readily admit that we can’t all be perfect Christians. Towards the end of the song, there’s a repetition of the chorus from ‘Wake Up’, which echoes the theme of the album perfectly. It feels like the whole thing is calling society to open their hearts to God and allow him to heal and help us.

Both ‘Unwavering’ and ‘Shadows’ show Serino’s softer side with beautiful soaring power ballads and swirling soundscapes, the latter of which features a duet with his wife Heidi. With lyrics such as “I question what is real but you fight for me still” and “I’ll always love you cause you have found me”, again, it’s ony of those that could work as a simple love song to his wife, or a love song to God, which makes it a perfect fit for believers and non-believers alike.

It seems to be a recurring theme in the style of his writing. Anyone could enjoy Andrew Serino’s music, and that’s the beauty of it. For those ‘in the know’, the lyrics have multiple meanings. They work on the surface as regular songs, but you can also easily see the spiritual nuances that are clearly important to Serino. Presumably the hope is that this way of writing will cause secular listeners to think on different levels and dig a little deeper, a subtle evangelising tactic which has merit and does actually work.

In short, it’s an excellent debut album with lots of potential for future growth. Andrew Serino is a vibrant, exciting songwriter with an important message delivered in an accessible and fresh style.

8/10

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Again I Ask, Do We?

Who is to Blame?

Do we?

Do we blame the murderer?

Or do we blame his alcoholic father who beat him and his mother?

Do we blame the weak mother who stayed with the alcoholic father and allowed it to happen?

Or do we blame the mother’s stepfather who raped her every other night for three years?

Do we blame the stepfather’s uncle who snuck into his room one night when he was visiting from out of town?

Or do we blame the uncle’s mother who died or his father who abandoned him for a life of drugs?

Do we hate and look down on them for not having the strength to break the cycle?

Or do they hate and look down on us for not loving them, our neighbors, as ourselves?

Do we think our sins are less than theirs?

Or do we see our pride and judgment for what they really are?

Do we think it’s okay to hide in our ignorance and in our safe bubbles?

Or do we see what it means when we ignore or condemn the freaks, the ones we don’t understand, or the ones whose sins are “greater” than ours?

Do we think we are good or better than anyone?

Or do we see our own sins and especially our “lesser” sins that contribute to the sins of others?

Do we blame ourselves for what we’ve done or haven’t done, for what’s been done or not done, and for whats been given or not given to us?

Or do we go to the beginning and blame the serpent who orchestrated all the sins of yesterday, today, and tomorrow?

Do we strive to do better once we know this?

Or do we know we can’t trust in ourselves to do better, but only in God’s love, goodness, and power that works through us?

Again I ask, do we?

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Using the Enneagram as a Tool for Spiritual Growth

Using the Enneagram as a Tool for Spiritual Growth

If you’ve been around Christian circles lately, chances are you’ve heard about the Enneagram (pronounced any-uh-gram).  You may have been asked, “Hey, what’s your number?” Or maybe you’ve been typed by someone, and they’ve exclaimed, “Ugh, you’re such a 3!”

While dozens are flocking to the Enneagram, others are wondering, isn’t it just like every other personality test? Our culture is obsessed with BuzzFeed articles, personality tests, and Meyers-Brigg letters. Amidst this culture of quizzes and profiles, the Enneagram is often dismissed as “Just another personality test.” While many personality tests provide surface-level results that often aren’t worth our time, the Enneagram has a much deeper value. When used appropriately, the Enneagram can be used as a tool for tremendous spiritual growth.

So, what exactly is the Enneagram? It’s an ancient personality typing system with 9 different core types, designated with the numbers 1-9. Each type has a different set of nuances and variations as well. Here are the 9 types:

Type 1 – The Reformer

Type 2 – The Helper

Type 3 – The Achiever

Type 4 – The Individualist

Type 5 – The Investigator

Type 6 – The Loyalist

Type 7 – The Enthusiast

Type 8 – The Challenger

Type 9 – The Peacemaker

What’s different about the Enneagram is that it doesn’t focus as much on what you do, but rather, what drives you. So, for example, Type 1’s are driven by a desire to be good, and Type 2’s are driven by a desire to feel loved. What the Enneagram does so powerfully is shone a light on the motivations that drive us, that we are oftentimes unaware of.

In his book The Road Back to You, Ian Cron explains how each type is often drawn to particular sin patterns. For example, Type 5’s are drawn to greed, while Type 4’s are drawn to envy. By developing an awareness of our inclinations and motivations, we are able to intentionally take steps towards Jesus and the life He is calling us to. Psalm 119:59 echoes this truth. It says, “I have considered my ways and have turned my steps to your statutes.” In addition, Lamentations 3:40 says, “Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.”

While some can use the Enneagram as a means of self-help and self-absorption, it can be a helpful tool when kept in its rightful place. The Enneagram was made by man, therefore it has flaws. Scripture is the only place we can go for unchanging absolute Truth. We must keep this in mind with every book, podcast, personality test, and sermon that we listen to or read. Everything should be viewed through the lens of Scripture, and if it does not agree with Scripture, then it is incorrect.

While not every book or teaching on the Enneagram is biblically accurate, there are several resources that provide tremendous help in spiritual growth based on your number. My caution is to hold up every resource to Scripture, understand that there is a nuance to the Enneagram and it is simply a guideline, and to use the Enneagram as a tool to grow closer to Jesus. If you are using the Enneagram and instead feel as though you are walking away from the truth of Scripture, I would urge you to stop or find a Biblical counselor to walk through the Enneagram with you.

So if you haven’t explored the Enneagram, I highly encourage you to do so! It’s very eye-opening and can be used as a great tool for spiritual formation. There are Enneagram tests online, but the results can vary based on how you answer different questions, which can be affected by your mood or any number of things. In my opinion, a better way to determine your type is to read through the type descriptions on The Enneagram Institute’s website. After reading through the types, you will most likely have a really good idea of which type you are. After discovering your type, continue to investigate your type. Use what you learn to walk closer to Jesus, falling hard on His grace, and continuing to be renewed in Him.

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When You Think of the Word Home, Does Jesus Come to Mind?

When You Think of the Word Home, Does Jesus Come to Mind

There is this certain sense of belonging, wanting to be known that lives inside each of us. We want the familiar state of being in a place where we feel safe, loved, and adored. For many, our memories are thrown back to the home we grew up. Scents of homemade cooking. Holiday celebrations. Laughter and giggles fill the room.

We long for THIS to stay with us all of the time.

And yet, this feeling eludes us.

Because we are not home yet.

In our text today found in 2 Corinthians 5:1-9, Paul encourages us not to fixate our eyes on the things of this world. Rather, remind ourselves that this place is not our home. Our temporal bodies where we reside are like a flimsy tent. Here today. Gone tomorrow. However, too often, we care too much about the here and now.

We focus on our flimsy tent, rather than our eternal dwelling. We fixate on skinny bodies, and how to look 10 (or more) years younger. We slather on our wrinkle cream and hope the bags under our eyes will dissipate. We long. We wish. Oh, how we desire to look and feel much better.

When we’re having a bad day and this world seems to engulf us, we must remind ourselves…we just ain’t home yet. When thinking of home, it’s much more than just a structure. For me, what’s most important is the people that abide within it. Now that I have two kids in college, I find myself longing for them to be home. The nest feels half-empty everytime that they go. Paul describes heaven not merely as a place. He describes heaven as being with the Lord…you see, it’s about the relationship.

Many of us feel at odds when we consider “What will happen when I die?”  We don’t think longingly about heaven because we’re not intimate with Jesus right now. Instead of our future home bringing us comfort, it seems like a far-off land.  We prefer to find our comfort in the things we can see with our own two eyes.

God has given us the Holy Spirit as a guarantee that we will go to heaven. If you don’t have this assurance, will you please send me a comment. We can be sure of where we’re going. “We walk by faith, not by sight” (2 Cor. 5:7).

When you think of the word home, does Jesus come to mind? Because really…when you get right to the point…he is the ultimate security blanket we can find.

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How to Ask for Help When Your Life Is in Shambles?

No Christian has a perfect life even if they try hard to make you believe they have everything under control. A lot of Christians do not talk about their problems thinking it is not what a “perfect Christian” must do. I met a lot of nice people in different churches through the years and most of them never talked about their problems only their victories and their successes, which might have a tendency of making you feel less than perfect if you know what I mean!

You know in your heart, you are doing your best. You read the scriptures, go to church, take part in many things to help others, go to Bible studies, pray, worship and much more. And you start to ask yourself if you are the only one with your life in shambles.

I strongly believe that if some scriptures tell us to give God our burdens it is probably because He knew we were going to face a few in our lifetime, and some more than others.

God doesn’t give us more than what we can handle right? But in the meantime, we have to get through those difficult times and if you are surrounded by people who will not even admit they themselves are facing those hard times, how can you get help and will you even dare to ask for help?

Please do ask for help. Be the first to admit you are facing difficulties and you might be surprised how people will react. A lot of brothers and sisters in Christ were thought to keep their feelings inside. Sharing them is a sign of weakness or even worse, sharing your feelings is a true sign you are not doing what you must. Meaning you don’t pray enough and you don’t have enough faith. Sadly I heard that too many times, and this can have a huge impact on someone’s faith. They might feel so inadequate and so ridiculous that they will even leave the church or go into deep depression.

It is so true that words can kill. They do. They can lift you up or bring you down. We need to be careful how we use them.

I also discovered through my spiritual journey that we need to surround ourselves with non judgmental people. We sometimes have to let go of some of our friends, even more so if they are bringing us down most of the time.

What we rather need is people with big hearts and open arms. You will know who they are when you meet them. Your heart will feel the automatic connection. The tender eyes on that person’s face, will tell you it is time to share your burden with that friend in God. It doesn’t mean you stop asking God for guidance, it just means that you are still human and sharing with friends or sisters and brothers who will become good friends, is the way to a healthy life in Christ. We all need each other. Each and every one of us, will eventually go through something very difficult,  and if you think you can get through it by staying alone all the time, you will eventually hit a brick wall and it will hurt real bad! That will be the “pride” in you crying out in pain. Let it cry! It needs to go anyway. Replace it with “confidence in God”.

Let go of all the doubts. Just share, cry, laugh and go on with the help of our beloved Father. He will guide you, only if you let Him. And while He is, your friends will be there to hold your hand. And as a bonus, after they’ve helped you, you too will be able to do the same for them, when they eventually need it!

This is what God wants for us. Help each other. Love one another. It’s that simple. Really!

-Smile.

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Miscarriages: Do We Really Mourn With Those Who Mourn?

Unless you have lost a child, you can never really sympathize with a woman who has suffered a miscarriage. It is a different kind of pain that a parent carries with them on a daily basis until they are able to reach some sort of acceptance or peace about it. Or perhaps we want to believe that they have either accepted the loss or gained peace because we do not want to ‘deal’ with that person. I do not believe that we do it out of selfishness- the reason is more complicated than that. How do you co-mourn when you did not ever meet the child? How do you offer up empty words of comfort when you know that the parent will not want to hear them? Who wants to hear: “Don’t worry, it’s all in GOD’S hands”, or “You will have another one, just have faith”, or even “Pray and ask GOD for strength”.

It has been nearly 34 years since the death of my brother, and I know that my mother has never truly fully healed from that. Jonathan was her first child and she carried him to term, but when he was taken out of her womb, he was stillborn. He may not have been a miscarriage, but he was still a life that was taken away before he got the chance to live. However many months you have carried that child in your womb, that connection is there. Whether you wanted that baby or not, that connection remains. So when you lose that child, a part of you seems to die with that child. Yes, you continue on with your life- you return to work, you eventually have more children (in some cases) and you raise them with all the love that you can give. However, you are not going to forget about that lost child. Every now and then, you wonder about the child, what they could have become, what their personality would have been like, who they would have resembled more. You dream of what could have been and, in some way, you even blame yourself for their death.

A mother’s womb is meant to be a place of security, but instead of producing life, it became a place of death. Perhaps you feel that you have failed as a woman, a wife, and a mother. The emotions that you go through are deep and painful, far deeper than we can ever imagine. Your thoughts are a place of darkness and woe. What can we, as the outsiders, really say to bring comfort?

As Believers, we are meant to rejoice with those who rejoice and to mourn with those who mourn. The truth is, we have become so wrapped up in our own worlds that we struggle to find the words to say, or just how to be around a parent who has just suffered a miscarriage. Many of us feel uncomfortable and awkward- do we pat your back in an effort to offer some physical comfort without ‘overstepping’? Do we quote scripture in an effort to explain away the tragedy and possibly downplay the pain that you are going through? Should we bring ready-made meals to lessen your worries? The question is, do these actions and words show you that we are really mourning with you? Some people will pretend that it didn’t happen, others will avoid you like the plague, worried that you are going to break down in front of them and embarrass them in public (it’s true). Others simply cannot handle seeing that amount of pain in others and will run, while others are simply insensitive and will offer up the same old useless words.

What can we do? What should we say? Can we hug you and let you lean on us when you’re weak? Can we cry with you, for your baby, the little being that we did not get to meet? Can we sit with you and listen as you tell us of your pain, your anger, and possibly the guilt that you feel? Will you provide us with your child’s name so that we may acknowledge his/her individuality? Can we sit with you in your silence, offering our presence as comfort? When ‘sorry’ will just not do, what can we say? We could never profess to understand your pain, it would be an injustice to pretend as though that life didn’t exist, and it would be insensitive to assume that you can ever replace your lost child with another one.

To every parent that has miscarried: at times we outsiders find it difficult to express our sadness for your loss. I personally mourn for every child lost, whether through miscarriage, abortion or other causes. While I cannot understand your pain because I have not experienced such a tragedy, there are many of us who want to truly mourn with you, to offer the comfort that only a person who is close with our LORD can offer. We would gladly take on some of your burdens to give you a moment’s rest from your deep pain. I speak to both the mothers and fathers- find a brother or sister in Christ and share that burden with them. Let them take on that burden in spirit so that you may find rest and eventually open yourself up to receive the comfort that Jesus wants to give you. Woman of GOD, you have suffered through a miscarriage, but that burden that you carry is not yours alone.

 

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