How To Change Bad Habits

Yesterday someone asked me how to change bad habits? Do you have habits in your life that you want to stop or change? Maybe it’s a bad attitude, bad behaviour, or even negative thoughts. No matter what you may want to change in your life, you have to start with changing your mind. You have to change your thinking so that your thoughts are in line with God’s thoughts. Once your thinking changes your behaviour will change. 

 When you repent and make the decision to follow God in every area of your life, you open the door for His supernatural power to work. When you take control of your thought life, through the Holy Spirit you are co-operating with the power that brings about change. Your life will go in the direction of your thoughts. You can’t just allow any old thought or image to play in your mind. You have to choose right thoughts.  

Today, the easiest way to change your thoughts is by speaking God’s Word. When you say “pear,” you probably won’t start thinking about an apple. In the same way, when you confess the Word of God, it will drive those negative, defeated thoughts away which will change bad habits! Change your mind today by changing your words and focus, so that you can move forward into the abundant life God has in store for you! 

“Repent (think differently; change your mind, regretting your sins and changing your conduct), for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” (Matthew 3:2, AMP 

Let’s Pray

Yahweh, today give me the strength to take captive every thought that is contrary to Your will. Father, I repent for anything in my life that is displeasing to You. God, please empower me today by Your Spirit, so that I can change my bad habits and bring honour to You, in Christ’s Name! Amen.

ReplyForward

Just Like Moses

In these tough times where our dreams seem to have been shattered, how do we accomplish what God has asked us to do? The task seems insurmountable in comparison to our ability. As you look at your life is there a feeling of inadequacy? You’re not the first one!  

When we think of Moses, we remember him as the great spiritual giant who led the Israelites out of captivity. But did you know that Moses doubted himself, too? He didn’t feel equipped. In fact, he was even self-conscious because he had a stuttering problem! God simply said to him, “What do you have in your hand?” In the next few moments, God showed Moses that it didn’t matter what equipment he thought he needed. The God of the universe can take what you have, and turn it into whatever it needs to be in order for you to accomplish what you’ve been called to. 

Today, God asks you the same question He asked Moses “what’s in your hand today?” It may not seem like you have much, but God wants to use it. He wants to take you to places you never dreamed. He wants to pour out His blessing and favour so you can live the abundant life He has in store for you! Hallelujah!

“Then the LORD said to him, ‘What is that in your hand?’…” (Exodus 4:2, NIV) 

Let’s Pray 

Yahweh, thank You for a new day, I release to You all that I am and everything that I have. Father, I invite You to take control of every part of me, please use me for Your glory. God, thank You for equipping me for the journey ahead. I trust Your Wor

He Is Still In Control

Why the Resurrection of Jesus Matters in the 21st Century

In the UK we have entered into another national lockdown. The frustration levels are high, anxiety has gripped millions, and jobs will be lost. In this confusing time we may decide to take control, as we think God and others are taking too long and our prayers are not being answered. 

We all have things we’re believing for, situations we want to see changed, and dreams God has placed in our hearts. But sometimes because of difficulties, we try to figure out how it’s all going to happen. Then we try to take control and start to tell God how to do it, when to do it, and where to do it! Scripture tells us that God’s ways are not our ways. They are so much higher and better. So we must continue to trust Him despite the times.

Today, as you move deeper into these uncertain times it’s clear things won’t happen on your timetable, but instead of getting discouraged and down, why don’t you believe that God has something better in store? Just because it doesn’t happen your way, doesn’t mean it’s not going to happen. God has a plan. He’s got it all figured out. Don’t limit Him by trying to get it done your way. Instead, tell God, “I trust You. I believe You have my best interests at heart, and even if it doesn’t happen my way, I’m going to stay in faith that You are still in total control.” 

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:9, NIV) 

Let’s Pray
Yahweh, thank You for blessing me throughout my life, Today I choose to trust in You despite life’s uncertainties. Father, I cast my cares on You. I give You my plans, dreams and desires for the future. God, I will stay in faith as You work things out on my behalf. I receive Your peace as I wait patiently to see Your plan unfold in my life, in Christ’s Name! Amen. 

I AM

As we come towards the end a year of uncertainty, one person that is certain is God! We serve a great and mighty God who is in control despite the chaos! He is the Creator of the universe, the one who spoke the worlds into existence. Scripture says He is the Great I AM, and He’s saying today, “I am everything you need. I am your strength. I am your wisdom. I am your protection. I am your provider. I am your way maker. I am your problem solver. I am your dream giver. I am your victory!” Hallelujah!  

In the Psalms David says, “Though I am surrounded by troubles, You will bring me safely through. Your fist is clenched against my enemies. Your power will save me.” Maybe you feel like David today.  

Today, you may be surrounded by all kinds of difficulties. You’re tempted to just settle right where you are. No, it’s time to get your fire back! Instead of focusing on how big your problems are, focus on how big your God is! He is everything you need. He is the Great I AM, and He is the one leading and guiding you into victory! 

“God said to Moses, ‘I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: I AM has sent me to you.’” (Exodus 3:14, NIV) 

Let’s Pray

Yahweh, thank You for being my certainty in the midst of all this uncertainty. Father, I declare today that I will focus on Your greatness. God, thank You for the reminder that You are in control – my I AM – my everything that I need to live the life of victory, in Christ’s Name! Amen.  

Rest, Release, Refresh, Restore

How would you feel if someone came up to you today and said, “Give me all of your monthly bills; I’m going to pay them.” You’d get pretty excited wouldn’t you? But it wouldn’t happen until you did your part to actually hand that person your bills. They can’t pay them for you if you never release them. In the same way, when we release our cares and concerns to God, He promises to take care of them. So hand them over.

As you begin a new year, God wants to give you rest. He wants to refresh and restore your soul, mind, will and emotions. It’s so easy to get caught up in the busyness of this stressful life, and before long, your mind, will and emotions are so spun that you can barely think straight! Remember, even in the hustle and bustle of life, you can find rest, ease and relaxation. During 2021 God wants to take care of everything that concerns you, so that you can find rest in your innermost being when you come to Him.

Today and throughout this new year, release your cares to the Lord. Let Him fill you with His peace and joy. Receive the rest, relaxation and restoration that He promises and enjoy the total fulfillment and blessings for your body, mind and emotions He has in store for you!

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28, NIV)

Let’s Pray

Jehovah, I humbly come to You. I choose to cast my cares on You, so that I can live in Your rest and break free from the stress of this life. Father, thank You for Your goodness to me. I give You my mind heal it and take control of all my emotions. Please God, lift my burdens and refresh my weariness. God, help me find ways to share Your rest and goodness with those around me, in Christ’ name! Amen.

It’s Time To Take Your Life Back

GodInterest exists to welcome people of all faiths and backgrounds, equipping people with a faith that works in real life and sends them into a world to serve for God and humanity.

Now, more than ever, our lives seem out of control, with governments making decisions for our every move. Have you ever felt like things in your life are out of control? That happens when you allow circumstances to dictate your thoughts and attitudes. You might say, “well, the economy is wreaking havoc on my business.” Or, “this relationship is just too far gone, it’s not worth trying.” My message to you today is “this is the day to take your life back!”  

Today’s verse tells us we must take control of every thought which is not a natural idea. We live in this natural realm, but as believers, we are not limited by this natural realm. We can tap into God’s supernatural power. But it starts by making every thought line up with the Word of God, and declaring I’m taking my life back in Jesus’ Name! Hallelujah!  

Today, from the government to the church, nobody seems to know what to do, and this confusion sows seeds of fear. By faith today I say take your life back. You may ask how? By taking your thoughts back from secular natural agencies. Don’t allow the enemy to have access any longer. Instead, meditate on the Word of God daily, and allow His truth to sink down deep into your spirit. Let His truth set you free! Hallelujah! 

“…take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

(2 Corinthians 10:5, NIV) 

Let’s Pray
Yahweh, thank You for empowering me to live in victory. Father, today I choose to take my life back from the enemy and his agencies by taking captive every thought and submitting it to You. God, help me to live a life that is pleasing to You, starting now and throughout my life, in Jesus’ Name! Amen.

His Goodness

I Just Can't Help But Talk About Jesus

In these uncertain times we can learn the attitude of the psalmist David. He was going through very tough uncertain times when he declared the words in today’s verse. He said in effect, “I’m not worried. I’m not upset. I am confident I will see God’s goodness.” In other words, “this situation I’m in may be rough, but that’s not going to steal my vision or joy. It’s not going to cause me to give up on my dreams. I am confident that in this crazy unpredictable year, I will see God’s favour unfold in my life.” 

Today, remember what you focus on, is what will come to pass. No matter what the medical report says, no matter what your finances look like, no matter how bad that relationship may seem, be confident that you will see God’s goodness unfold in your life!  

Today, during this strange year, 2020, we must not forget our God is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnibenevolent. He is the creator of the universe, and He holds you, your plans and your dreams in the palm of His hand. So you can be confident nothing is too difficult for Him! Take hold of this truth by faith and focus on His goodness today! 

“I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.” 

(Psalm 27:13, NIV) 

Let’s Pray 

Yahweh, thank You for Your goodness in my life. Father, I remain confident in Your power to control my life in these uncertain times. I will focus on You no matter what my circumstances may look like. God please give me Your peace as I keep my mind stayed on You in Christ’s Name! Amen.

Faith In The Midst Of The Storm

There are always reasons to get upset and be stressed out. The storms of life come to every person, you are not unique or too good. No matter how good a person you are, you’re going to have some “rain” in your life. When these storms come, a lot of people use their faith to try to control their circumstances, but I’ve found it’s better to use my faith to control myself in the midst of my circumstances.

If we can just remain stable in the storms of life and stay in peace, we give God permission to act on our behalf. Remember, God never said that we wouldn’t have difficulties, but He did promise we could have peace in the midst of the storms. 

Today, when you face adversities, one of the most powerful things you can do is simply stay calm. When you are at peace, you are displaying your faith in God. By your actions, you’re saying, “God, I know You’re still on the throne. I know You’re bigger than this problem.” So keep the peace in the midst of your storms today. Trust that He is working behind the scenes. Keep your heart open to Him, because soon He will deliver you!

“…he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike.” (Matthew 5:45, NLT)

Let’s Pray

Yahweh, thank You for peace in the midst of the storms of life. Father, I choose to hold my peace knowing that You are working for me. God, I trust You, I trust Your timing, and I trust that You are working everything together for my good because You love me, in Christ’ name! Amen.

Change Me Lord!

Shock the Culture — How millennials can (really) change the world

When we ask God to change us or fix us, and He begins to do a work in our lives, things can get a little uncomfortable before we see change, or while He is changing us. We may encounter people who are hard to get along with, or experience circumstances that seem beyond our control. When this happens, instead of getting upset or complaining, just pause and say, “Lord, thank You for doing a work in me.” 

Did you know God is more interested in changing you than He is in changing your circumstances? If you choose to stay sour because you’re not getting your own way, or if you get discouraged because things aren’t happening on your timetable, that’s going to keep you stuck, miserable and sad. 

Today, if you want to see change, if you want to see God open up new doors, the key is to bloom right where you’re planted. You can’t wait until everything gets better before you decide to have a good attitude. You have to be the best that you can be right where you are. When you bloom where you’re planted, you’re allowing God to work in you, and He will be faithful to complete the change He started in you! 

“…he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6, NIV) 

Let’s Pray

Yahweh, I thank You for doing a work in me. I’m not complete but I can see growth in my life. Father, I will align myself with Your plan, so I can bloom wherever You plant me. God, help me, by Your Spirit, to be an example of Your love and life everywhere I go, in Christ’s Name! Amen.

My Steps Are Ordered

This week one of my prayers has been that God would give me direction and a renewed vigour. When we encounter difficult situations, we can be tempted to wonder if we are on the right path for our lives. And yes, sometimes we make poor choices that get us off course.  

If your heart is following after God, if you’re determined to stay in faith and put Him first in your life, you can be confident that you are right where you are supposed to be in God’s will! You might say, “that couldn’t be right. I’m uncomfortable. Somebody isn’t treating me right.” God will not allow a challenge to come into your life unless He has a divine purpose for it.  

Today, remember when God is in control, things don’t happen to us they happen for us. Hallelujah! In other words, God uses those difficult things to grow us and stretch us and take us to another level. He orders our steps. So stay in faith, keep a good attitude, and let God lead you into the righteous plan He has for you! 

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord…” (Psalm 37:23, KJV) 

Let’s Pray
Yahweh, thank You for ordering my steps and directing me. Father, I trust that You are at work in my life, even during the times when I don’t understand what’s happen in my life. God, please give me the strength and courage to do what is right in Your sight. I bless You today and always, in Christ’s Name! Amen.

Don’t Get Angry Because Things Get Out Of Control

Early in the morning on Sunday I was awaken suddenly by an incident that made me very upset. Every day, we have opportunities to get upset, frustrated or offended. Maybe you had plans that didn’t work out, or someone was rude to you at the supermarket, or at the office. Maybe you were doing something that should have taken one hour and it ended up taking three.

Life is full of frustrations, but even though we can’t always control our circumstances, we can control our reaction. I heard somebody say, “life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond.” We should go out each day with a positive attitude, full of hope and expecting God’s favour. But at the same time, we should recognise that most days are not going to go exactly as we plan. Remember, we were created to live in peace. Peace is our position of power.

Today, if you get stressed because you got off schedule, or upset because your child wouldn’t eat his breakfast, or frustrated because somebody offended you, what you’re doing is giving away your power. Instead, make the decision to release those offenses and disappointments so you can live in peace, and enjoy the day as the blessing God prepared for you!

“Good sense makes a man restrain his anger, and it is his glory to overlook a transgression or an offense.”

(Proverbs 19:11, AMPC)

Pray With Me
Yahweh, today I release all my care, concern, offence and disappointment to You. Father, I will do my best to keep the peace, even when life gets out of control and I get frustrated and angry. God, I won’t give away the power of peace that You have blessed me with. Help me have the right attitude at all times. I look forward to today knowing that You are with me, leading me into victory, in Jesus’ Name! Amen. 

Real Talk: Postcode gangs

The notion of so-called postcode wars may have slipped from the headlines recently but the territorial divisions continue to exert a powerful influence on the lives of thousands of young Londoners. 

This lady gives her thoughts on Knife Crime in the UK. We salute this woman for speaking out! The passion in her voice is intense.

Guns, Gangs and Postcode Wars 

The youth culture seems to be falling apart at the moment. We’ve seen a real sea change over the past few years, with a significant increase in the number of people who have been injured, in the number of injuries sustained per person, and the severity of those injuries.

The more deprived the area, the more they try to assert control over the one thing they can lay claim to: the streets. Concepts such as hood passes and stripes may seem alien to anyone over 21 but are considered normal by an entire generation. 

Politicians need to get their act together and pour money into this right now. Tomorrow is too late. Parents also need to take responsibility.

Gang-related organised crime in the United Kingdom is concentrated around the cities of London, Manchester and Liverpool and regionally across the West Midlands region, south coast and northern England, according to the Serious Organised Crime Agency. With regards to street gangs the cities identified as having the most serious gang problems, which also accounted for 65% of firearm homicides in England and Wales, were London, Birmingham, Manchester and Liverpool. Glasgow in Scotland also has a historical gang culture with the city having as many teenage gangs as London, which had six times the population, in 2008.

In the early part of the 20th century, the cities of LeedsBristolBradford (including Keighley) and Nottingham all commanded headlines pertaining to street gangs and suffered their share of high-profile firearms murders. Sheffield, which has a long history of gangs traced back to the 1920s in the book “The Sheffield Gang Wars”, along with Leicester is one of numerous urban centres seen to have an emerging or re-emerging gang problem.

On 28 November 2007, a major offensive against gun crime by gangs in Birmingham, Liverpool, London and Manchester led to 118 arrests. More than 1,000 police officers were involved in the raids. Not all of the 118 arrests were gun related; others were linked to drugs, prostitution and other crimes. Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said it showed the police could “fight back against gangs”.

THE WORDS ON OUR STREETS
Irrespective of who uses it and for what purpose, street slang is constantly evolving. Words in common parlance five years ago like “buff” (good-looking) are now deemed antediluvian, replaced by newer terms such as “chug”, “peak” and “wavey”. “Skadoosh”, a personal favourite, is a relative newcomer. 

Bang – punch
Bare – a lot
Bate – obvious
Blud – friend
Booky – suspicious
Butters – ugly
Chug – good-looking
Dutty – nasty
Fam – friends
Gallis – womaniser
Gased – talking nonsense
Gem – fool
Ghost – to be frequently absent
Greezy – bad
Junge – whore
Liccle – small
Marga – extremely skinny
Moist – no ratings, silly, naff
Murk – attack
Nang – good
Peak – used to highlight an eventful situation
Peng – good-looking
Shank – stab
Shower – cool, good
Skadoosh – goodbye
Skettel – loose woman
Slipping – to be caught off-guard
Swag – crap
Tekkers – technique
Wallad – idiot
Wavey – high or drunk

You Don’t Control The Outcomes Of Your Life, Principles Do.

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 14:27

There always have been and always will be two classes on the earth to the end of time–the believers in Jesus, and those who reject Him.

Sinners, however wicked, sinful, evil, abominable, and corrupt, by faith in Jesus Christ will be purified and made clean, through the doing of His word. and the blood of Jesus Christ which was shed on calvary.

Those who reject Christ and refuse to believe the truth will be filled with bitterness against those who accept Jesus as a personal Saviour. But those who receive Christ are melted and subdued by the manifestation of His love and His humiliation, suffering, and death in their behalf.

The peace that Jesus Christ gave to His disciples, and for which we pray, is the peace that is born of truth, a peace that is not to be quenched because of division. Without may be wars and fightings, jealousies, envies, hatred, strife; but the peace of Christ is not that which the world giveth or taketh away. It could endure amid the hunting of spies and the fiercest opposition of His enemies…. Christ did not for an instant seek to purchase peace by a betrayal of sacred trusts. Peace could not be made by a compromise of principles.

It is a grave mistake on the part of those who are children of God to seek to bridge the gulf that separates the children of light from the children of darkness by yielding principle, by compromising the truth. It would be surrendering the peace of Christ in order to make peace or fraternize with the world. The sacrifice is too costly to be made by the children of God to make peace with the world by giving up the principles of truth…. Then let the followers of Christ settle it in their minds that they will never compromise truth, never yield one iota of principle for the favor of the world. Let them hold to the peace of Christ.

Should I Do Yoga if I am a Christian?

Recently I’ve been on a spiritual journey that includes deep prayer, meditation, and mindfulness to help me to connect with God. At the same time, I’ve also been on the hunt for some low-impact stretching that could potentially help with chronic pain in a natural way.

Meditation and stretching. Put those two together and what do you get?

Yoga.

So, I’ve said I need to stretch. And I find that meditation brings me closer to God. These all naturally come together in the form of yoga. But, as a Christian, should I do yoga? Am I allowed? Will Jesus love me less?

Well, first, let’s see”¦what does the Bible say about the word “yoga”? Nothing. Zero. There’s no record of that word being used.

So now what do I do? Since the Bible doesn’t talk about yoga specifically, I have to use the brains God gave me to dig a bit deeper. Then I can determine how best to deal with this current cultural trend.

Let’s start with a few of the basics:

Yoga began as a spiritual disciple in Hindu which includes breath control, meditation, and static postures of the body. Some people who practice yoga are active Hindus or Buddhists. Many are not.
In the western world, yoga is a broad term that is often descriptive of people engaging in the physical body postures that encourage strength and stamina. Sometimes this is combined with meditation for mental strength, but not exclusively. Some yoga classes used sacred words such as “Om”, “Namaste”, and certain chants that hint to Buddhism and Hinduism. Other classes make no reference to the spiritual world at all and are simply a form of physical exercise. Yoga potures have Sanskrit names that have spiritual meanings. Many times these are replaced with English names that simply describe the form the body is taking. (For instance, “lotus” has become “criss-cross applesauce”.)

The word “yoga” in Sanskrit means “yoke” or “union with God”. God tells me to not worship another god, and I must obey.

So I know that yoga started as an ancient spiritual practice of another religion which should lead me to move forward with caution. But I also know that Jesus came to redeem all things.

Is it possible to engage in a moderated form of yoga that feeds our Christian souls, or should we avoid it altogether? Can we be aware of the potential pitfalls and dangers of the spiritual side of yoga and then practice it in a meaningful way with a Christian bent and attitude?

The famous American minister John Piper seems to think that we can’t. He says we should avoid yoga completely, citing it as antithetical to Christianity.

Don’t get me wrong, I think Piper has some good things to offer. But in this situation I tend to think that maybe he’s throwing the proverbial “baby out with the bathwater”.

Christians have often taken “secular” symbols or practices and re-stored them into something that is healthy and even God-glorifying. Take Christmas, for example. December 25, the day on which we now celebrate Jesus’ birth, was reclaimed from the pagans. That date was redeemed from a pagan holiday to a Christian celebration.

Jesus has come to redeem all things. Even pagan holidays. Possibly even stretching and meditation and breathing?

Over the ages, Christians have used wisdom and the discernment to choose what is right for them as individuals and as a Body of believers. To apply Jesus’ redemption to various non-Christian things.

“Everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial.” 1 Corinthians 10:23

So I need to decide if yoga could be beneficial (or detrimental) to me. In my case, I truly believe God has given me the wisdom and discernment to be able to stretch and strengthen my body without accidentally worshipping a false god. I even believe that I can meditate and breathe while I simultaneously reflect and contemplate how incredible God is. All without slipping into the devil’s snare.

But I am aware that this may not be the case for all people.

Personally, think that I can apply the idea of a “yoke” or “union with God” in yoga to my relationship with Christ. But that doesn’t mean I’ll just sign up for any yoga class that is offered. I need to be wise and first ask questions about how spiritual a class is before taking it. For my own purposes, I tend to learn at home with videos, so there’s not much of a risk of me getting caught in an awkward situation. If something gets a little weird, I can just turn it off.

Holy Yoga is a practice that is gaining traction, offering the grounding of the Gospel while reframing the positive aspects of yoga in a Christian way.

Holy Yoga embraces the essential elements of yoga: breath work, meditation and physical postures. In all of these elements, Christ is the focus of our intention and worship.”

So as I‘m making a decision about yoga (or anything in my life!), I need to ask if it creates a risk of becoming a detriment to my walk with Jesus. If so, then I absolutely shouldn’t do it! But if yoga can be practiced in a way that is healthy to my body and mind, while drawing me closer to Christ with mindfulness and meditation, then is it possible that even John Piper can’t argue with that?

5 Truths about God’s Design for Sex in Marriage

5 Truths about God’s Design for Sex in Marriage

Living in an over-sexualized culture, we hear messages about sex, wrong messages.   These messages become more a part of us than God’s truth because we hear them repetitively and churches are scared to address sexuality.

For too long, I believed the world’s message about sex.   That it’s a superficial, feel-good avenue to self-satisfaction.   Wrong, partly.   God did design sex to feel good!

But, there is more than that.   He designed it for profound spiritual, physical, and emotional connection.   It is just a shadow of things to come.

God’s design of sex is too amazing to keep silent about.

Here are five truths about God’s design of sex in marriage.

God designed sex to be bonding.

Not only spiritually bonding, but emotionally and physically.   When the two become one flesh, biochemicals are released in our bodies like oxytocin and dopamine.   Oxytocin, especially, is a bonding chemical.   When I embraced this truth and started engaging in the marriage bed more, the tone of our marriage completely changed.

“This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh,” Genesis 2:24 (NIV).

God designed sex for both husband and wife to experience pleasure.

It’s an equal opportunity activity.   Why else would there be a clitoris?   It’s only function is for pleasure.   The Song of Solomon is full of beautiful poetic language about the pleasures of physical love for both spouses.

If one spouse struggles with the ultimate moment, there are Christian resources available to help the couple understand how to achieve mutual enjoyment.

“The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my beloved,” Song of Solomon 7:13 (NIV).

God designed sex so that we would know yearning.

Before you were married, you yearned for your fianc.   Not only did you crave your fiance’s touch, you craved his/her presence and knowing him/her better.  Even after years of marriage, it is good to remember this yearning.  It mirrors how God desires us to yearn for him.   I believe this is one reason he frequently uses the marriage as a symbol of his relationship with us throughout the Bible.

“Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us?” James 4:5 (NIV).

God designed the marriage bed to be a place to show the fruit of the Spirit.

Peace, patience, love, joy, gentleness, kindness, faithfulness, goodness, and self-control are the foundation of all Christian life, especially the marriage bed.   All conflict surrounding the marriage bed can be managed through employing these key traits.

My own marriage endured a long season of mismatched sex drives.   It was through these qualities and some wise communication tools that we overcame our conflict.

God designed sex as a powerful mystery.

Biblical stories of sex often confused me when I was young.   There was some nasty stuff in the old testament, the rape of Dinah, Lot and his daughters, the men of Gibeah  clammering for the male visitor, Leviticus 20.   And yet, there is the beautiful Song of Solomon.   The New Testament seemed to prefer celibacy, to be honest.   As a teenager, I couldn’t understand why I liked thinking about sex if it was disgraceful and violent.

But, as an adult, I realized the stories were teaching me that sexual intimacy is powerful and mysterious.   It’s OK not to have it all figured out, as long as you respect the power it holds to do good when it is aligned with God’s perfect design.

“For my thoughts  are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the  Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways  and my thoughts than your thoughts,” Isaiah 55:8-9.

Final Thoughts

Don’t let the world’s message of cheap sex destroy the meaningful sex in your marriage.   Sex may only be a small portion of the whole of your marriage.   However, sex matters.   It especially matters if one spouse is more interested than the other.   When we ignore its power and importance in marriage, the relationship suffers.

Now, granted chronic health issues can affect sexual function and that’s a more complicated story.

 

Top 11 Qualities That Make A Great Leader

There are different styles of leadership and they can (nearly) all be good.

1. Be Authentic

The important thing is to be yourself: know your own personality so that you can be authentic in the way you engage with other people and the way you use your authority. Understand how you as an individual can best have positive impact and influence with others and try to understand how they perceive you. Always be clear in communicating your values, what you care about and what you stand for – through your behaviour as well as your words.

2. Boost Your Confidence

If you want to be a leader you have to be prepared to lead. It does require self-confidence. You have to be able to judge when to listen, when to think and when to decide. When you make decisions you need to stick with them through adversity if you are sure they are right, and to see them through. People like continuity. If at some point you conclude that you were wrong, you need to be big enough to change and to explain why. The best solution is to make the right decisions! It is more important to make good decisions than fast decisions.

3. Display Emotional Intelligence

But you can only lead if other people are prepared to follow. That means you have to win and retain their respect, not just for your position but for you as a person, for your experience, skills, and competence. A leader has to have a strong rapport with, and understanding of, the organization and the people he or she is leading: what they want, and what they will accept if they can’t have what they want. Emotional intelligence and intuition are important in forming these links.

4. Motivate and Inspire

In leadership, people and relationships are more important than tasks. Tasks do matter, but the main role of a good leader is to motivate and inspire other people to do the tasks well. You need to know how to delegate and be the leader of other leaders. The leader is the conductor of the orchestra, not the first violin. But you also need to know when to step in and take responsibility. Don’t be afraid to say ‘stop’ or ‘no’ if you think things are going wrong. And don’t let other people push you into a decision which you are not comfortable with.

5. Set the Vision

You have to set a vision. That requires a clear sense of purpose, a clear sense of direction and a clear picture of the destination. You need to be able to explain in terms that people understand and support what you want to achieve, why you want to achieve it, how you will go about it and how everyone will know when you get there. That is what I have been trying to do with Diplomatic Excellence.

6. Be a Good Communicator

Good leaders are good communicators. You have to do it all the time. It means thinking about what other people know and how they are experiencing what you are doing, especially change. It’s important to communicate in a way other people can relate to and engage with. And you have to make it easy for people to remember what you are saying: make it simple, clear and coherent.

7. Lead the Delivery

Once you’ve set the vision and engaged other people through communication, you need to lead the delivery. That’s where a clear understanding of the end goal, and metrics and evaluation to demonstrate outcomes, are important. It’s a good idea to stay ahead of the delivery curve, setting interim goals along the way which are stretching but attainable. Much of what I’ve just described in the last three points is encapsulated by Steve Radcliffe in the model he discussed at the Leadership Conference last year: future, engage, deliver.

8. Manage  Your  Energy

It’s important to manage your energy. Leaders are constantly on display and under scrutiny. You need to have energy in reserve so that you can manage your mood and the image you project, and have something in the tank when crises happen (as they inevitably will). Learn to recognise when you are tired or stressed, and how that makes you behave. Watch out for the signs. Learn also to recognise where your positive energy comes from and what takes it away.

9. Build the Right Team

A good leader will put a lot of effort into building the right team around him or her. You need people you trust, who are on your side, who challenge and are honest with you and whose judgement you respect. You need to be able to depend on their support when the going gets tough. Being a leader can feel lonely and exposed: so you need to have your support systems in place to help you through the harder times.

10. Trust Your Instinct

If it doesn’t feel right, the chances are it isn’t right. I’m a great believer in the power of the subconscious, given time, to steer us to the right answers. That’s why I often prefer to have a couple of discussions before taking a difficult decision, even if that slows down the process. It helps give me certainty about what I think, and it helps the wider leadership group understand each other’s point of view and build consensus. The end result is a better decision with better buy-in.

11. Make Mistakes

Finally, accept that we all make mistakes. Nobody is perfect. When you do, try to learn the lessons, but don’t be destabilized. Someone told me once: “don’t chew the cud”. Keep moving forward, be resilient, remember that things will get better. And smile.

Author

Lee Glynn is a dedicated individual with over 18 years experience & knowledge within the wonderful world of recruitment. Having held roles as a Managing Director, Non Executive Director, Director, Leader, Business Adviser, Mentor, Strategist and Trainer to the Recruitment, Staffing, Professional Industry. Lee has extensive knowledge and experience for all frameworks and business models inc (Crown Commercial Services, London Procurement Partnership, NHS Collaborative Procurement Partnership, HealthTrust Europe & NHS Shared Business Service that are used by the NHS & Private sectors. Lee Glynn is currently helping the NHS & Private hospitals reduce their Agency and permanent spend. This article has been published on Linkedin.

 

 

 

As seen on