What Does the Bible Say About Friendship?

The Bible gives helpful insight about friends and friendship. Here are some truths we can glean from Scriptures:

1. Stronger friendships are those bonded by faith.

“I am a friend to all who fear you, to all who follow your precepts.” (Psalm 119:63)

We can be a friend to all, both to unbelievers and believers like us. But by spiritual design, we can discover the closest of friendships with those who hold the same faith and passion for God like we do. They are more spiritually keen on encouraging and restoring us in times of spiritual lowness. They know better how to give correction and reminders when we lose our way.

2. Gossipers are rarely good friends.

“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.” (Proverbs 16:28)

We trust that our closest friends do not speak about us to others and with right friends, that’s quite always true. It is rare though for one to be a habitual gossiper and yet at the same time be a true friend that can keep the confidence and secrets of other friends.

3. Hot-tempered friends are likely to get you in trouble and can even influence you to become hot-tempered too.

“Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.” (Proverbs 22:24, 25)

“Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33)

Have you ever gotten in trouble on account of your friend? If yes, then you know from experience what these passages speak about. More so, a short fuse is easy to catch. You spend a lot of time with an impatient person and sooner or later, you become impatient yourself. So is being with an angry person.

4. Right friendships help you grow and improve.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)

“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”

(Proverbs 27:5-6)

C.S. Lewis believed that “The next best thing to being wise oneself is to live in a circle of those who are.” A thing demonstrated is easily caught. If you want stimulation then be with people who can stir your heart and mind toward higher knowledge and better pursuits. Treasure and spend more time with those that prod you towards improvement. Aim for friendships that build you up and not tear you down.

5. Good friends are qualified to be brutally frank.

“Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” (Proverbs 20:5,6)

“Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.” (Proverbs 27:9)

Oscar Wilde said, “True friends stab you in the front.” It is wrong to think that an argument is a sign of poor friendship. True friends should have the freedom to speak freely with one another. Open yourself to correction and opposition from your closest friends. You need honest views and insights that can help you make decisions and needed changes in your life.

Proverbs 12:26 says, “The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.” It is true that the people you choose to be with can either bring out the best or worst in you. We should remain friendly and accessible to all men so that we can reach people with the love of Christ. We should also be selective as to whom we spend more intimate moments with for these are the very people who will have an influence in the shaping of our hearts and minds.

April 2, 2018November 13, 2018

Why the Resurrection of Jesus Matters in the 21st Century

On Easter morning, thousands of people put on their nicest dresses, ties, and hairstyles and went to a Church gathering. Many had big meals with family, and continue to celebrate all day long. As you go to these celebrations and church services, you may be asking, why does Easter really matter? Why does the Church celebrate something that happened 2000 years ago? Does it still matter today, in the 21^st century? And if so, what does it have to do with me?

If you are asking these questions, I’m so glad you’re here. Let me tell you, if you believe the message of Easter, which is the resurrection of Jesus Christ, your life will be completely altered forever. So with that, let’s look at why Easter is important.

The entire Bible tells one big, continuous story that points to Jesus. In Genesis, we read about God creating everything; the earth, space, oceans, land, plants, and animals, night and day”¦and the peak of His creation, man and woman. God created us in His image, and He created us to live in relationship with Him.

However, we decided to rebel against God. This tore us from being in a perfect relationship with Him and set us up for a life of pain and death.

Despite our rebellion, God had a plan to restore a relationship with us and to make everything right again. In Genesis 3, God promises to one day send Someone to defeat sin and death, and save His people. In Genesis 3:15, God said to the devil, “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.”

This foreshadowing of Jesus’ coming continues throughout the Old Testament. God makes a promise to a man named Abraham, that He will make a great nation of his family, and one day, this promised savior would come from his family line. This family became the nation of Israel.

The rest of the Old Testament shows how God pursues Israel, despite their constant rebellion against Him. Then, we come to the book of Matthew. A virgin became pregnant and named the baby Jesus. This baby was fully God and fully man. He lived a sinless life and modeled what true life looks like. He spent the majority of his first 30 years of life as a carpenter. He then became a Jewish rabbi and began to disciple 12 apprentices. He spent the next three years of his life preaching, teaching, performing miracles, and healing people.

Jesus’ message was scandalous. The religious leaders and government officials were threatened by Him. They devised a plan to have Him killed. He was stripped, beaten, and then hung on a cross to die. He was put in a tomb, and His followers mourned. Was He not who He said He was? Was He not the One promised in Genesis that would save us?

Three days passed, and all hope seemed lost. A few of the women who followed Jesus went to the tomb where His body lay, but they were shocked to find the stone rolled away, and an empty tomb. Instead, there were two angels there to greet them. The women fell to the floor, terrified and confused.

Luke 24:5-8 says, “And as they were frightened and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, ‘Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was till in Galilee, that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.’”

Jesus paid the price for our sin, conquered sin and death, and now reigns victoriously! He promised that He would one day come back to Earth, to ultimately restore all things. He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right-hand of the Father, where He will be until He returns to Earth again.

That is what we celebrate on Easter. If you trust in Jesus and follow Him, you will have eternal life in Jesus. He invites you into His Kingdom, and that life starts as soon as you turn to Him. When you enter the Kingdom of God, His Spirit comes inside you and helps you to walk in intimacy with Him, and newness of life. Romans 8:11 says, “If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.”

This life that Jesus offers isn’t easy. It’s messy, scandalous, and different than anything the world has to offer. It is the only way to a life that offers true life, satisfaction, and joy.

In John 16:33, Jesus said, “I have said these things to you, that you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

I don’t know what you’re facing today, but Jesus promised we would face tribulation in this world. It could be a lost job, a scary diagnosis, family strife, an unplanned pregnancy, fill-in-the-blank”¦No matter what you’re going through, cling to Jesus as your hope! He has overcome the world and is bigger than anything you can face in this life!

So as your Easter festivities wind down and you go back to your daily life, I challenge you to look to Jesus. If you have not yet turned to Him and begun walking in the life He offers, would you consider it? He is so much better than anything this world can give you. He loves you and is eagerly waiting for you to call out to Him.

“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.” Revelation 3:20

April 2, 2018November 13, 2018

What Does It Mean to Have a Sound Mind?

God says we do not have a spirit of fear. God gave us power instead, He gave us love, and He gave us a sound mind and all of these promises will work in the middle of the chaos and in the utmost impossible situations.

This week I have faced yet another diagnosis, I have a heart defect and a couple of other heart/lung related issues on top of my over 10 autoimmune diseases. I can feel myself dragging behind, my spirit is saddened and deep down I am fighting the fear off with all of my might. As I ponder and research this new threat against my life, this new stronghold and life-altering thing, a spirit of fear has tried to grab hold of me this week but I can rest assure that not only has God not given me a spirit of fear, He has given me a spirit of sound mind and I do not have to own the negative thoughts coming my way.

The urban dictionary definition of “Sound Mind means; To be mentally calm and self-confident in your actions. 1 Timothy 1: 7 could be translated as:

“God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of power and of love — He has given you a mind that has been delivered, rescued, protected, and brought into a place of safety, so that it is no longer affected by illogical, absurd thoughts.”

Stand Firm—You’re Not Alone

It is important to read the word of God daily so that your spirit and mind can build up protection. When you have the word of God inside of you it shows on the outside, as well as the inside, you begin to think differently. When you allow the Word of God to work in your mind, it protects and retrains your emotions.

Prepare for Battle

When you begin to take charge of your own thoughts and live your life for God, Satan will fight you. You will have to battle his lies and the confusion, you will have to discern what does and does not line up with the word of God. Believe me, this fight will not be an easy one. Stand on your faith and stand firmly on the word of God.

Don’t Give Up!

Ten years ago, my Dad taught me an amazing trick as I battled some of my deepest mental and spiritual battles. He told me to imagine that I was standing at the feet of Jesus with a box, take all the irrational thoughts and all those thoughts that were driving me crazy and put them in the box, then slide the box over to the feet of Jesus. He said when you do that, you no longer own those irrational thoughts, those thoughts and confusions now belong to Jesus, so, that’s what I did. I imagined that box and every time I had an irrational thought I ran to that box and put all my irrational thoughts in that box and kept pushing it over to Jesus.

To this day, as I fight autoimmune diseases and now heart defects and whatever else may come up next. I will continue to place all of my irrational thoughts, all of my worries in that box and slide it over to Jesus. Today, put your worries, fears, anxieties, and irrational thoughts in the box and slide the box over to Jesus. AMEN

April 1, 2018December 6, 2022

Where Have All the Fathers Gone?

As soon as Rhys heard the front door open, he jumped up and began shouting for joy, “Mom Daddy’s home, Daddy’s home!”. His heartbeat racing and his brown eyes shining excitedly, anticipating playtime with Daddy. A wide grin spread across Rhys’s face as Daddy acted like a big bear. Daddy quickly dropping down onto one knee so that he’d be at his son’s height to horse around the living room. Sadly this scene is becoming a rear sight to see.

Today let’s talk about the invisible dads, the ones who don’t marry Mummy, don’t support their kids and don’t hang around for the hugs, kisses and nappy changes. There are millions of them around the world, and their numbers are growing.

“Today, more than one in four births is to an unmarried mother, and more than one in 10 births is to a teenager. These numbers portend a future of fragile families. Once considered primarily a racial problem, fatherless homes have increased across a wide range of demographics over the last ten years.”

How have we come to the point where a child with two parents is the exception rather than the norm? It is time that we put the issue of fatherless families front and center on our national agenda.

So who’s the real problem here? And why should we care?

It is time to shift our attention to the issue of male responsibility, and to the indispensable role that fathers play in our society.

Firstly, it would be an oversimplification to assume that two parents are always better than one as there are many courageous and loving single moms and daddy’s who are able to balance the competing demands on their time and attention, to care and provide for their children alone.

However, contrary to the sentiments of our culture and though our society is only beginning to recognize it, the presence of fathers within the home is vital to the moral integrity of a society. The short-term effects are already far too evident as statistics reveal that the loss of fathers is reverberating throughout the world in the form of social pathologies ranging from teen pregnancy to drug abuse.

Fatherless children are five times more likely to be poor and twice as likely to drop out of school as children who live with both parents.

Boys, without proper male role models, look to other sources for the male bonding they need. In the inner cities that often entails gangs while in the suburbs it tends to be online.

“According to the latest statistics, the increase in the proportion of single-parent families accounted for about half of the overall increase in child poverty from 1979 through to 1987.”

The Scriptures warn us about the power of fatherhood, as well as the long-lasting impact that fatherhood has on us all. Exodus 20:4-6.” Fatherlessness is the most harmful demographic trend of this generation

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree

“The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” could be both about habits/behavior and also looks. Have you ever thought about that? Do you often find yourself reacting to a situation the way your father did? or scarier yet…do you ever see your mannerisms in your son? The footprint of a father leaves a permanent mark on the soul of a child.

Fatherhood is under assault

We hear a lot about the war on women…but it is the war on Dads that is causing the greatest damage in the world today. It’s not hard to find. If you watch any popular sitcom on television today, you’ll likely notice that fathers are typically portrayed as childish, irresponsible, lazy, incompetent and stupid.

The doofus dad stereotype isn’t new. There’s Fred Flinstone, and even Charlie Brown’s monotone parents. But according to Tierny, the consistency of these new portrayals has slowly created a new norm opposed to what being a father used to mean.

Dads make a difference. Dads can be heroes – if only we give them the chance. We remain optimistic that family still has more influence than media.

We all need another hero

Fathers are representatives of God on earth; as our heavenly father is the giver of life so also are the earthly father’s givers of life. Malachi 4:6 says “And he will turn, the hearts of the fathers to the children, And the hearts of the children to their fathers, Lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.”

God understands the importance of a father’s love and cares towards their children and He has set the standard by being the first example of a loving father.

“The SARRI report quotes research which found that “the presence of a father can contribute to cognitive development, intellectual functioning, and school achievement. Children growing up without fathers are more likely to experience emotional disturbances and depression.”

“Girls who grow up with their fathers are more likely to have higher self-esteem, lower levels of risky sexual behaviour, and fewer difficulties in forming and maintaining romantic relationships later in life. They have less likelihood of having an early pregnancy, bearing children outside marriage, marrying early, or getting divorced.”

A father’s touch

The first thing, therefore, that a father can do for his children is to love their mother. Another part of a father’s task is that of a protector for his family. But, Daddy also has another task in the home, which is to combine tenderness with strength, and to model the combination so consistently that the children regard the combination as natural.

Our kids must come to know naturally both that dad’s standards protect them, and that his love makes them strong.

Where have all the fathers gone?

Our courts do not value fatherhood as much as motherhood. In 2015 it is still the case that mothers and fathers do not have equal rights

And herein lies the problem. Our expectation of the role a separated father should play in his children’s lives is so low, that when half of dads who win “access” to their kids can’t even sleep under the same roof as their offspring, academics declare this to be an overwhelming success. One of the fruits of the feminist movement many claim is the idea that a woman is more responsible as a parent than the father is.

“He is not my Dad…he is just someone you sleep with!” How many mothers have felt the sting of those words? That is why God hates divorce. We should too.

Our culture has put asunder things which God has joined together—things such as tenderness and strength. It is the job of the father to put them back together again.

Fatherhood, like Motherhood has is its own rewards – as most dads have found. Sadly, for the others, the invisible ones, it is a gift foolishly squandered.

April 1, 2018March 18, 2019

In Uncertain Times Christ’s Death and Resurrection Offer Comfort and Hope

Understanding what the resurrection of Christ means for us as Christians is key to living a vibrant life in this trouble-laden world. Believers are not meant to just get by with living. Jesus says He had come so that we might have life and have it more abundantly. (John 10:10)

The Resurrection Saint may not always be aware of powerful declarations that hold true in his life. Whatever the circumstance, these remain true:

“I am an overcomer.”

An overcomer is someone who prevails over opposition or debility.

An overcomer surmounts.

Christ did not say we would never fail. He did not promise that we would never face hardships. In fact, Scriptures assure us that in this world, we will have tribulation. We are also warned that those who pursue godly lives in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. From Paul’s life we know that there will be weaknesses we will keep struggling with. But Scriptures did say, “Everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith”¦ because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.”

Jesus allowed himself to taste death for every man’s redemption but he did not stay dead. He resurrected his body as a sign of His sovereignty and superiority over all. This same Jesus is the author of our faith and He is power at work in our lives, bringing us to betterment and maturity day after day. (Philippians 4:13)

“I am becoming new.”

Some oppose the idea of adopting the symbolism of the Easter Egg into the Christian celebration of Resurrection Sunday. However, it is interesting to note that the Easter Egg can be an appropriate symbol for new life. We see a freshly hatched egg and we see hope birthed. We see fresh life coming into this world. We see an egg and we understand that we don’t see a finished product before us, rather, we see all the great prospects of what that life can be.

That is the very description of our new life in Christ. 2 Corinthians 5:17 says that “anyone who is in Christ is a new creation. The old has gone and all things are becoming new.” This is tremendous truth and hope to you, the child of God. You are never stuck. You are never a hopeless cause. Things can always get better and they will. You are Spirit-empowered with great capacities for growth and this power is accessible to you at all times (Acts 1:8). You can’t undo the past but you can live a better life from today.

A song rendered by Sandy Patty, “In Heaven’s Eyes” is a wonderful reflection of how God looks upon us and see who we can be through His eyes of grace. The lyrics of the chorus go like these:

“In heaven’s eyes, there are no losers,

In heaven’s eyes, no hopeless cause.

Only people like you, with feelings like me,

Amazed by the grace we can find,

In Heaven’s Eyes.”

Are you losing hope today? Are you out of wind? Ponder the meaning of all that Christ has accomplished for you that Resurrection Sunday and stay encouraged in this life. Each time the enemy comes to steal your joy and your drive, just look back on the resurrection of Christ and let its significance lift your spirits. Remember your declarations and know that no lies of the enemy can change the fact that these declarations are forever true in Christ.

April 1, 2018

Shock the Culture – How millennials can (really) change the world

Shock the Culture â€” How millennials can (really) change the world

We all have opinions, and often they are shaped from an experience we may have had at one time or another. The day-to-day life of a believer is no different. Whether we are at work, school, or running errands, we run into people who challenge religion, the church, or Jesus himself. There is even a former presidential candidate who stated that Christians should not hold positions of influence within government. As such it’s becoming more and more common to be openly hostile to Jesus and His church in our culture today.

Why is that? Why do people feel it is acceptable to marginalize any group? Isn’t it widely accepted that people shouldn’t be judged by which group they belong to? While we can complain about the perception the world has of us we need to ask ourselves whether their perspective is the reality?

We’ve heard all of the common complaints against the church. We’re selfish, hypocrites, or we think we’re better than everyone else. Where do they get these ideas? Wouldn’t it be much nicer if they used the fruits of kindness to describe us?

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentlenesses and self-control. Against such things, there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23, NIV).

Believers sit on a fence, and we have our hearts firmly planted in the faith while our feet are planted in our day-to-day activities. Is this just a public relations issue or is it systemic throughout the Western Church? Regardless, there is a disconnection in the way we perceive ourselves, and the world perceives us. It is as if the word “Christian” is synonymous with “Hypocrite” in our society.

In his book “The Way Back: How Christians Blew Our Credibility and How We Get It Back” Phil Cooke lays out a fairly compelling argument that it is not a public relations issue, however, a real issue with us. While writing this book, Cooke conducted some research into the churches behaviors.

70% – 80% of Americans classify as Christian, however, attendance at church weekly is 20% of that number. Cooke states that American Pastors claim that regular attendance at church is 3 out of 8 weeks according to most pastors (19 Sunday’s in one year!)

Of the 20% that attend a service, 63% say that prayer is essential (which means 37% don’t think prayer is essential)

Of the 20%, only 10% give 10% of their earnings as tithing

Cooke states that all of the things non-Christians say about us are true. It’s as if we’re the fat guy at the gym who is lecturing everyone on health.

Our churches focus on baptism, tithing, and attendance. All of which are at all-time lows. Did Jesus focus on those things? Shouldn’t we aim to be more like him? How did Jesus walk? He stood up for the weak, the oppressed, and the sick. He healed the broken and rose people from the dead. You still sad that Chick-fil-a is closed after church?

It is true, God has time for murders, adulterers, and other sinners, however, he does not have time for a believer who knows what to do and doesn’t do it.

The mission

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another.” (John 13:35, NIV)

The early church rose from nothing. No political power, money, education, or plans. How did the disciples go from being a fringe group to being the most influential forces in the world?

The disciples were committed. How many of us can say we’re even half committed to the great commission? They made a substantial impact on Roman culture by taking in the sick, outcast, and downtrodden. In Roman times infanticide was a major issue. People would dispose of their babies and wouldn’t even give their baby a name until they decided if they’d keep it. One of the major tactics the early church did was to take in these abandoned children. They created hospitals, orphanages, and universities. The Roman culture started to wonder who these people were and were drawn to the love they displayed.

Real world example

Going out of your way to help someone is a struggle with our busy lives today. However, I’d like to share with you a real story that we can all relate to.

Tara, a member of a local church reached out to the local church community for help through the ARISE app crowdservice tool. It is a tool that churches use to coordinate acts of kindness and to reach out to their local communities. Her mother (a believer who doesn’t really attend church) needed to move, and she didn’t have enough money to pay a moving company. She was just diagnosed with cancer and needed to move in with her other daughter. Within a matter of a day three people (all from different churches) said they’d help. The day was set and the move was happening.

Tara could not be there on moving day so her sister came. She is an atheist and was anti-church. She didn’t have luke-warm opinions, she had very warm opinions of the church and let’s just say they did not resemble Galatians 5:22-23.

The move went smooth and the van was packed up in no time. No one threw a bible in her face or tried to perform an exorcism on her. A few days later, Tara asked her sister how the move went and she was taken back that three random people would show up to help her mother like this. Tara said to her sister “you know that they were all Christians, right?” Tara’s sister reply was great, she said: “well, I like those Christians.”

Just a simple act of kindness can move mountains. Just imagine what would happen if we as a church reached out like this? We’re not saying we all need to become Mother Teresa, but if we actively took part in performing acts of kindness like this the perception of the church would change, just as it did in ancient Rome.

What are the ways we can shock the culture?

There are 450,000 kids in foster care system today. What a large number of kids, right? No, not when you realize that there are 350,000 churches in America. If one family in each church said they’d take one or two kids, the whole system would be wiped out in one year, then each year another family did it. If the church body supported the family thereafter to help care and love these kids, we would transform lives!

It’s called crowd-service. It’s when large amounts of people chip in random acts of kindness to make a huge impact for Christ. The ARISE app is built for this: to show the world God’s love and grace. This is how we can change the public relations issues that the world has of Jesus and grow deeper in our relationship with Him.

Would another orphanage, hospital, or school shock our culture? Probably not, but would a new technology that upended the very core of the social safety net in western civilization? Absolutely, we use technology for money transfers, taking pictures, and many other things, why not to show the love of Jesus?

When people are in need they should turn to the church, not the government. We are here to love them. The roadmap is here: we are to love our God and love our neighbor. Let’s take that and apply it to these modern times.

Next Steps

Download the ARISE app today and get started. Ministry programs are great, but you need to take ownership of your own faith and love your neighbor yourself. Your pastor can’t love God for you. Bring what you have and remember what Jesus did with the fish and bread when he fed the multitudes. Are we different than the rest of society? What do I want to be? A complacent person who goes to the Sunday morning social club or a navy seal for Jesus? If your church isn’t pushing you to be active in your faith, then you need to find another church.

Together we can shock the culture in the same way that they did in the first century. What’s stopping us? Read their manifesto to learn more about this mission.

March 30, 2018January 15, 2024

So You Think You’ve Married the Wrong Person?

5 Truths about Godâ€™s Design for Sex in Marriage

When I saw Roger’s Facebook profile photo, my first reaction, if I’m honest, was that he wasn’t good-looking enough for me. Yet when he sent a message saying I was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, I gave into his invitation for dinner, she says in regret.

“According to a new survey of more than 1,600 divorcees, 49 percent admitted they were worried on their wedding day their relationship would break down, and two-thirds considered leaving their spouse-to-be at the altar.”

“A sixth said they hoped their partner would change after the wedding, while others said they got married in the hope that it would “all work out” in the end.”

Lord, I’m sorry! I married the wrong man. Please forgive me, she cries out in agonizing prayer.

No couple should expect bliss every day and most couples know that perfection is not on the cards. Nevertheless, there are couples who display such deep-seated incompatibility, such heightened rage and disappointment, that most people will conclude that something else is at play beyond the normal scratchiness: they appear to have married the wrong person.

How do such errors happen, in our enlightened, knowledge-rich times? To avoid becoming a “statistic,” try to internalize these 7 insights.

#1. You picked the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you’re married.

Many Christians may assume that non-believers are more likely to marry the wrong person because they lack God’s guidance in finding their one true love. But not so fast. Unfortunately, the number of Christians divorcing is no lower than that of non-believers.

“Singles today (and most married couples too) are searching for super-spouses that simply don’t exist.”

Movie star Mickey Rooney said, “Marriage is like batting in baseball; when the right one comes along, you don’t want to let it go by.” It sounds good, until you realize that Mickey was married eight times. He must have had a lot of “good pitches” to swing at!

Mickey Rooney has what might be called the “needle in a haystack” view of picking a mate.

But you won’t find a “wrong needle” clause in the Bible that gives you an “out” if you conclude that your spouse isn’t right for you. Instead you’ll find in Malachi 2:15, “Do not break faith with the wife of your youth.”

Surprising to many, the Bible never tells us to find the one God has chosen. It tells us how to live with the person we have chosen. It’s easy to take our thoughts to the extreme when we’re so unhappy. But lets not forget that God says in the Bible says, “Come, let us reason together” (Isaiah 1:18). You didn’t marry a mind reader. Don’t fault him or her for that.

#2. You picked the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on character.

Many societies portray marriage as a temporary arrangement that can be adapted or forsaken at will. When first looking out for a partner, the requirements we come up with are coloured by a beautiful non-specific sentimental vagueness. All of us are crazy in very particular ways. All too many people say their vows without a real commitment to their spouse or to God.

Marriage is not primarily about finding the right spouse. It’s about being the right person. In his classic work, The Art of Loving, Erich Fromm declares, “To love somebody is not just a strong feeling—it is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise.

#3. You choose the wrong person because you do not share common life goals and priorities.

Biblically, a Christian should be looking to marry another believer who shares a similar commitment to following the Lord Jesus. Marriage to an unbeliever should be avoided (2 Corinthians 6:14). So, if a Christian marries a non-Christian, he or she may have indeed married the wrong person.

#4. You choose the wrong person because you got intimately involved too quickly.

“Do you know unmarried couples who attend church, have consensual sex, and may even live together? According to a recent study by the Barna Group,”

The Bible is filled with lots of info about sex, and believe it or not, God thinks it’s a great idea! And why shouldn’t He, He invented it and declared it to be “good.”

Many Christian couples also justify cohabitation with the rationalization that they are going to get married eventually. However, the Bible promotes complete abstinence before marriage. Sex between a husband and his wife is the only form of sexual relations of which God approves (Hebrews 13:4). Sex within marriage is pleasurable, and God designed it that way. God wants men and women to enjoy sexual activity within the confines of marriage.

If you believe Christ died on a cross for your sins and you are trusting in Christ alone for your salvation, Christ commands you to pick up your cross and follow him (Matt. 16:24). Sex outside of marriage is a sin, no matter how a person tries to interpret Scripture otherwise, and every Christian is called to obey God in this aspect of life. Jesus said.

Also consider this, if the Bible’s message on sex before marriage was obeyed, there would be far fewer sexually transmitted diseases, far fewer abortions, far fewer unwed mothers and unwanted pregnancies, and far fewer children growing up without both parents in their lives.

#5. You picked the wrong person because you didn’t put everything on the table.

Let’s start off with the big one. TRUST! When a spouse is persistently and relentlessly lying about dim-witted things, it causes worry and doubts to set up camp. The journey begins like this. A young man or woman identifies the person he or she wants to marry and begins the business of serious courtship. Time and money are no object. They have a worthy goal and are motivated, even if that means telling lies in the process.

“You look as beautiful today as the day I met you.” “Of course you don’t look fat in that.” “I’m not angry.” “I wasn’t looking at her, I was just noticing her boots.”

Legally, all you need for a wedding is a visit to the county clerk’s office, and whatever else your local government requires. Most weddings these days skip the garter toss; many skip the bridesmaids and groomsmen, and some even skip the flowers. But what matters most is that you tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

“If you tell the truth, it becomes part of your past, however, if you tell a lie, it becomes part of your future”. ~ Author Unknown”

Wow does that quote nails it, or what??!!

#6. You picked the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from personal problems and unhappiness.

In many places in the world, a fantasy is promoted that marriage should meet all our needs—the emphasis being on meeting one’s own needs, not the needs of one’s spouse. However, people that are unhappy when single and expect marriage to fulfil their lives are greatly disappointed as their level of contentment will drop even lower when married. Unrealistic expectations are those demands you make of your spouse of which he or she is incapable of providing.

“When you’re single, you experience a range of contentment from low to high. However, when your married, that range becomes even wider in both directions. Greater contentment—or discontentment.”

God wants to destroy you, not the physical you, but the selfish you. Jesus taught us that if we don’t die to our selfish nature, we will never be able to experience all the blessings that God wants to bestow on us. Well, if there was ever an institution designed to kill the selfish you, it’s marriage. In fact, it is virtually impossible to succeed at marriage if you don’t learn how to let the selfish part of you die.

#7. You picked the wrong person because you did not consult with God

“I don’t think I can do any better. He or she said, It may sound clich, but if you don’t respect and love yourself, it will be difficult to respect and love another person.”

Surely we aren’t destined to fail. So maybe we have misunderstood the will of God. I know that sounds simplistic. Many people claim that is the problem with their marriage. If they could go back and press rewind, if they knew back then what they know now, they would have made different decisions. But remember that God promises us that if we ask, He will give. And while asking, request that the Holy Spirit guide you as your Wonderful Counselor (Isaiah 9:6).

How can a person prevent getting married to the wrong person?

The truth is, a successful marriage is not the result of marrying the “right” person, feeling the “right”emotions, thinking the “right” thoughts, or even praying the “right” prayers,

Instead, keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards,” is good advice (Poor Richard’s Almanac, June 1738), but even more helpful is to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness (Matthew 6:33).

March 30, 2018

Unravelled

Reflecting upon 2017

A new year is bestowed upon us once again. Once again I find myself reflecting on the previous year. Likewise, I am praising God for triumphs and trusting Him with ongoing struggles as our family prepares for 2018.

Thankfully, last year brought healing for myself and my family. This was more of a spiritual, soul healing. The year started off with leftover pain from the latter part 2016. Once spring rolled around, I was ready to let go and give my hurts to God. Once I was able to lay it down and walk away, God smiled as He tenderly comforted me. His forgiveness allowed me to forgive.

Around the same time I was finally able to move forward from the pain I had held onto for so long, my husband lost his job. Now, surprisingly this wasn’t much of a storm for us. God had strengthened us from a previous job loss that lasted a year. At this point, we had learned to do a nice little jig in the rain. It’s a great testament to God’s handiwork through previous trials when you can fully trust him in the valley.

The job loss lasted a few months and our family was met with an open door from a company that would give us hope for the future. This new job opportunity required my husband to work out of state for two weeks at a time. He would then be home one week and return for another go around. The job was physically demanding for my husband. Not only that but working in full gear, combating RA symptoms, in the summer heat did a number on him.

After one of his shifts, he called me as he did every other night. He was very discouraged and I could tell his voice was weak. He was telling me that he just couldn’t do the job. I knew in my heart he had the most determination I had ever seen in a person. I never imagined that he would really have to quit.

But he did. I was devastated.

After I had some time to process the situation, I was able to determine what caused all of my angst. I had built my hope so high on this job and the promise of a better future. When this came crashing down I unravelled. I don’t think I have ever been so caught off guard with something that I felt I had some kind of control over. In reality, I had zero control. However, I had already planned on these future dreams for our family and I assumed that it was written in stone. When the tablets were scattered in pieces below my feet, I just couldn’t handle it. It took a few days, but I eventually got over it. My husband and I also had a nice laugh about how crazy I had acted! Not only that, but I realized that sometimes God will allow you to unravel to preserve you with His truths.

“Sometimes God will allow you to unravel to preserve you with His truths.”

God is sovereign

Regardless of how I thought things should turn out, God ended up having a job waiting on my husband when he got home. I knew this was some of that amazing mercy being poured out from our loving Heavenly Father.

The rest of the year was mostly uneventful and it was a welcome change.

Well, almost.

Fast forward to the day after Christmas. At 7:30 that night, my husband and I found ourselves in the ER with our four-year-old son. He had a broken elbow. Did I mention he is autistic and mostly nonverbal? Yea. Good times.

Even though I was dreading the visit, I knew I had to be strong. I had envisioned the worst possible scenario in my mind and I was expecting it to go down for everyone to see. This is what I like to call autism awareness; real-life meltdowns in public places that include shrieks, hitting, and tears. Sometimes I try to explain and sometimes I just let the actions of my child do it for me.

We got back to the room and waited for the doctor. After several pain-filled X-rays came the diagnosis and a temporary splint.

We returned home and my husband was shaken to the core. It was definitely an unwanted visit, but it had gone better than for what I had prepared. God had so strengthened my weary heart over the past year that, I felt as if he was giving me a new perception of our special needs world.

My son sat there on the ER bed, screaming. No words to express the pain and anxiety. Only high-pitched dissatisfaction to portray how he felt in that moment. Right before they came to splint his arm, he had let out the loudest, highest-pitched yell that I had ever heard. While he was belting it out, his eyes were locked steadily on mine. Halfway through the noise, I could clearly hear what my son was saying. “I’m scared, mommy.”

I had held it together up to that point. But, even as the tears rolled uncontrollably down my cheeks, for the first time, my heart had a clear purpose. I understood why God had chosen us for this special needs journey.

I couldn’t stop thinking about how many special needs children and adults have been left out in the cold by families who would rather not.

These families decided they would rather not have autism in their lives. They would rather not have to deal with the stress that comes along with raising a child with special needs. They would rather not, but rather let someone else handle it. More than likely an institution or the state government.

I have read about the institutions that housed special needs children and adults in the 1940’s. My stomach turned and my heart broke reading about the living conditions. Not to mention the abuse. The parents of those precious souls decided they would rather not. By the sounds of it, the people that were to be caring for those that couldn’t care for themselves had made the same decision. There is nary a word in the Oxford dictionary that can give justice to what those children went through.

All of these thoughts had pierced my heart the instant I heard my son scream his lungs out- his only way of communication.

Yes, he was helpless. Yes, my heart broke for him.

What hurts the most was knowing that there are still families that decide that they would rather not. Instead of institutions, they choose cages or closets in their own home. They would rather not, so they literally put their autistic child out of sight AND out of mind.

So, when my husband talked about how hard that trip was, I was secretly rejoicing.

We are so very privileged to be able to provide the care our son needs. We are blessed that our family was chosen to freely extend the love of Jesus to a child that has needs outside of society’s norm.

Autism Acceptance

Which brings me to the sum of the autism equation.

Because modern medicine has made leaps and bounds since the days of special needs institutions, autism families are more empowered. Families are given sooner diagnoses and quicker treatment plans. Often times, these plans include a team of people that come alongside the family for care and support. It’s a far cry from cold sterile rooms and days without normal human interaction.

As these families gain support through therapies and treatments, their load is greatly lifted. They are more likely to venture out in public and risk a meltdown. Instead of feeling abandoned and alone within the walls of their homes, they feel like society is warming up to the idea of autism and the uncanny nature that comes with it.

And therein lies the solution.

Love. Understanding. Acceptance.

March 30, 2018March 30, 2018

Album Review: The Bigger Picture – Jerry Fee

For those unfamiliar with Jerry, he’s a thirty-five-year-old singer-songwriter from Spring Hill, Tennessee and this will be his third full-length studio album, having released two EPs prior to that back in 2014. To think he’s released so much music over a four year period is certainly a testament to his prolific songwriting and recording. He has already garnered comparisons to twenty-one pilots, Imagine Dragons, TobyMac and Mutemath, which may give readers an indication of what to expect here – twenty-five minutes of unadulterated synthy-pop goodness.

The album opens up with the funky ‘Learning To Love (Like You)’, which definitely sounds like some kind of 80s throwback, with its toe-tapping beat and infectious chorus, it wouldn’t sound out of place on a Wham record. Except it’s about Jesus, which obviously makes things a lot better – “remedy’s got a name: Jesus”. It definitely sets the tone for the rest of the album, immediately making you want to get up and dance, or at least rock about in your seat a bit.

Title track ‘The Bigger Picture’ addresses the important issue of how easy it is to drift our focus away from God in the busy, over-commercialised and sin-centered world we currently occupy, with Jerry begging the Lord to help him see that “bigger picture” and “lift the veil away” so that he can better walk in the light.

‘Stars (More Of Who You Are)’ has a bit of a reggae feel to it, and again starts with a bit of an 80s island throwback, with plenty of pop synths and delicate guitars, then moves to a rap in the middle, crossing genres into hip-hop. The uplifting and positive chorus declares that God is “proven in the stars, written on our hearts”, the theme of the message here being that evidence of the Lord’s works is all around us if we open our eyes and hearts to see his blessings and receive his grace.

‘Color The World’ was the first single off the album, which Jerry has described as being about “this life, our one time around, is our one shot to ask God how we can join Him in making the world more beautiful – to colour the world”. It’s upbeat in its electro-pop style, with a solid rhythm section and slick production.

This collection of eight delightful songs finishes off with ‘Never Gonna Quit’, with a synth riff that you can’t help bopping to, and a determined message that “fear will not rule me” and with God’s love we can achieve anything.

None of these songs particularly sound like overly in your face worship music, but if you actually pay attention to the lyrics, the meanings behind them are very clear. It’s the type of music you could play to a secular friend to try and bring them to salvation and it wouldn’t totally freak them out (hint: you should try that)!

The musicianship is of a high calibre, the instrument choices diverse, the vocal delivery spot on, and with the occasional dabble into different genres, it’s certainly an enjoyable little album that shows promise of more in the future.

Jerry Fee is an artist who’s still making a name for himself in the industry but is definitely one to watch out for. His releases can be found on Spotify, Apple Music and all the usual digital outlets and are well worth checking out. Wind your way over to his Facebook too and hit like to support an up and coming Christian artist.

Rating: 7/10

March 29, 2018January 15, 2024

5 Truths about God’s Design for Sex in Marriage

Living in an over-sexualized culture, we hear messages about sex, wrong messages. These messages become more a part of us than God’s truth because we hear them repetitively and churches are scared to address sexuality.

For too long, I believed the world’s message about sex. That it’s a superficial, feel-good avenue to self-satisfaction. Wrong, partly. God did design sex to feel good!

But, there is more than that. He designed it for profound spiritual, physical, and emotional connection. It is just a shadow of things to come.

God’s design of sex is too amazing to keep silent about.

Here are five truths about God’s design of sex in marriage.

God designed sex to be bonding.

Not only spiritually bonding, but emotionally and physically. When the two become one flesh, biochemicals are released in our bodies like oxytocin and dopamine. Oxytocin, especially, is a bonding chemical. When I embraced this truth and started engaging in the marriage bed more, the tone of our marriage completely changed.

“This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh,” Genesis 2:24 (NIV).

God designed sex for both husband and wife to experience pleasure.

It’s an equal opportunity activity. Why else would there be a clitoris? It’s only function is for pleasure. The Song of Solomon is full of beautiful poetic language about the pleasures of physical love for both spouses.

If one spouse struggles with the ultimate moment, there are Christian resources available to help the couple understand how to achieve mutual enjoyment.

“The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my beloved,” Song of Solomon 7:13 (NIV).

God designed sex so that we would know yearning.

Before you were married, you yearned for your fianc. Not only did you crave your fiance’s touch, you craved his/her presence and knowing him/her better. Even after years of marriage, it is good to remember this yearning. It mirrors how God desires us to yearn for him. I believe this is one reason he frequently uses the marriage as a symbol of his relationship with us throughout the Bible.

“Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us?” James 4:5 (NIV).

God designed the marriage bed to be a place to show the fruit of the Spirit.

Peace, patience, love, joy, gentleness, kindness, faithfulness, goodness, and self-control are the foundation of all Christian life, especially the marriage bed. All conflict surrounding the marriage bed can be managed through employing these key traits.

My own marriage endured a long season of mismatched sex drives. It was through these qualities and some wise communication tools that we overcame our conflict.

God designed sex as a powerful mystery.

Biblical stories of sex often confused me when I was young. There was some nasty stuff in the old testament, the rape of Dinah, Lot and his daughters, the men of Gibeah clammering for the male visitor, Leviticus 20. And yet, there is the beautiful Song of Solomon. The New Testament seemed to prefer celibacy, to be honest. As a teenager, I couldn’t understand why I liked thinking about sex if it was disgraceful and violent.

But, as an adult, I realized the stories were teaching me that sexual intimacy is powerful and mysterious. It’s OK not to have it all figured out, as long as you respect the power it holds to do good when it is aligned with God’s perfect design.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts,” Isaiah 55:8-9.

Final Thoughts

Don’t let the world’s message of cheap sex destroy the meaningful sex in your marriage. Sex may only be a small portion of the whole of your marriage. However, sex matters. It especially matters if one spouse is more interested than the other. When we ignore its power and importance in marriage, the relationship suffers.

Now, granted chronic health issues can affect sexual function and that’s a more complicated story.

March 29, 2018January 15, 2024

Can We Find God Through Nature?

What Does It Mean That God "Speaks" Through Creation?

The world began with a story. A spoken word made material through the creator of the universe.

The Lord is good to all people and his tender mercies are over all his works.

All thy works shall praise thee, O Lord; and thy saints shall bless thee. Psalm 145:9, 10.

We love to contemplate the character and love of God in His created works.

But what evidences has He given the children of men of His power, as well as of His parental love?

The vastness of the universe gives testimony to God as Creator. The Hubble telescope continues to reveal previously unknown galaxies. Our awesome universe simply astounds us. Under the night sky, King David of ancient Israel asked God:

“O Lord our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the earth! .When I consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained; what is a man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?”

“All thy works praise thee, O Lord; and thy saints shall bless thee” (Psalm 8:1, 3, 4; Psalm 145:10).

The Suitability For Life On Earth – An Example Of God’s Witness In Nature

The physical size of the earth is just right to support life as we know it.
The moon is just the right distance from earth. If it were much closer, tides which are now harmless, would completely submerge the continents twice a day.
The composition of the atmosphere is about 78 parts nitrogen and 21 parts oxygen, just perfect, as too much nitrogen in the atmosphere would slow down all functions of the body so that death would finally result.
The atmosphere of the earth also serves a protective blanket to shield us from deadly radiation.
Water is colorless, odorless and without taste, and yet no living thing can survive without it. Plants, animals and human beings consist mostly of water (about two-thirds of the human body is water).

This Is Not A Coincidence!

It is difficult to believe that all of these things are a series of fortunate coincidences.

To Enjoy Nature, Is To Enjoy God

The prevailing cosmological view during the Middle Ages in Europe was that the Earth was flat, instead of round. However, had our world been formed on a perfectly flat surface the tediousness, lack of variety, variation and the repetitiveness and uniformity would have fatigued the eye and wearied the senses and created a lack of interest, excitement, and eventually dreariness.

Instead, God has dressed our world with hills, valleys, and ranges of mountains. The rugged granite and mountains decorated with evergreens, and valleys with their softened beauty make the world a mirror of loveliness.

We can never be lonely while viewing the grand scenery of nature.

The snow-capped mountain heights, hills, and valleys should be to us as schools in which to study the character of God in His created works. The works of God which we may view in the ever-varying scenesshould teach us lessons of the skill and love of God and of His infinite power.

Those who study nature cannot be lonely. They love the quiet hours of meditation, for they feel that they are brought in close communion with God while tracing His power in His created works.

March 28, 2018November 13, 2018

Living Through Grief

Death. Most of us do not choose it for ourselves, much less for our loved ones. Both of my children died before me. Each year as I approach the anniversaries of their deaths, Pax in May 1982 and Catherine in April 2011, I walk a journey of remembrance.

Many of those who have been bereaved of precious loved ones find themselves doing this. We replay conversations. We think about who said what, who did what, what happened next. We may remember the weather vividly or some other detail. The last time we shared a meal together is a precious memory.

Remembering in this way is a natural part of the human experience of loss, and we are reminded at Easter that this is also a normal part of our Christian experience.

We are beckoned onwards this week. We know what’s coming. We began on Sunday, a lovely sunny day as it happened, celebrating the arrival of Jesus in Jerusalem. We’ve sat at his side at the table for the last meal with his followers, breaking bread and drinking wine in remembrance.

Evening falls, and we watch with him in the garden as he prays and weeps. We wait with bated breath for the arrival of Judas, the Betrayer. Our hearts are racing as we consider what happens next: Jesus is about to suffer. He will be ridiculed, questioned, accused; he will be stripped, beaten, crowned with thorns.

It is Good Friday now. We follow his faltering steps as he carries the cross. We are not alone. Crowds of grief-stricken women also follow, weeping and mourning.

Can it get worse? Yes, it can and it does. Jesus suffers the pain of crucifixion; the wooden beams are raised and he hangs there. Most of his friends have abandoned him. Still, his enemies mock him. There is agony, there is blood, and then there is death.

This journey of remembrance is painful yet it is one that is taken by many millions of Christians throughout the globe each year. Tears are shed as we dwell for a time on the sacrifice Jesus made in choosing to accept this cruel death.

Nobody tells the multitudes of mourning Christians to “move on” during Easter week. Nobody tells them, “stop your crying,” and expects them to “find closure” when the body of Jesus is laid in the tomb.

But so often that is the attitude of others towards a grieving spouse or partner or parent or child or sister or brother or friend. The Christian community does not always travel well with the mourners. There is usually sympathy for the person whose heart has been broken by loss, but the expression of that sympathy can be shallow. Often it simply does not acknowledge the depth of the pain of loss.

“She’s at peace, she’s with the Lord now.” (Yes, but she’s not here.)

“At least his suffering is over.” (But why did he need to suffer? Why didn’t God heal him?)

“It was God’s will.” (Really?!)

“Time heals all wounds.” (Nothing and no person can replace the person I’m missing.)

“Everything will be okay.” (How can it be? They’re gone!)

“Don’t you need to think about moving on soon?” (Moving where exactly?)

And the list of clichs and platitudes continues. We’ve all heard them, and most of us have probably said them at some point in time, in a well-intentioned effort to comfort the grief-stricken.

But would those have been our words of support if we had mingled in that crowd of grief-stricken women following Jesus to his death? Would they have been comforted?

Come Saturday, if we had found ourselves in the locked room with his disciples, would we have spoken those trite sayings? Would we have told Mary his mother, “time heals all wounds”? Would we have told John, “It’s time to move on”?

I don’t think so.

We now know that the days leading up to the big event – the procession, the supper, the betrayal, the trial, the crucifixion – were not the end of the story. The anguish and hopelessness was followed by Sunday. The sun rises. Jesus conquers death.

But on the way to that victorious moment, there were many tears.

As individual Christians grieving our personal losses, the message of Easter does give us hope, but it is simplistic and just plain untrue to think that this all we experience. We are living with the sad absence of our loved ones and that can be hard to bear.

I have hope that my children are at peace and that one day I will see them again, but I still miss them.

I imagine how Pax would have looked and behaved if he had reached his 4th birthday, his 10th, his teens. It is hard for me to conceive how different my life would be if he was here now, perhaps a parent himself, which would have meant I was a grandparent. He would be 39.

And I miss dear Catherine, with her generous heart, funny sense of humour and love of cooking, but also her struggles with bipolar disorder. I miss her phone calls, I miss our visits. I miss having a daughter to advise me on clothing styles. I miss long talkative walks. I miss being able to congratulate her on her latest attempts at work or study. I miss sharing a cup of coffee or a meal out.

Easter isn’t only the palm branches of celebration and the sunrise of hope. There is also a procession of tears. Being more honest about grief, acknowledging it, facing into it, is how I believe we can survive the losses in our lives, as well as support others who are walking through their own dark valleys. The Road of Grief – How Well Do We Travel with the Mourners?

March 27, 2018April 24, 2020

Can Rock Star Alice Cooper Really Be A Christian?

Thinking back to the rock celebrity from the 1970s, Alice Cooper, and your mind will probably conjure up images of a creepy long-haired guy with runny black eye makeup who plays with snakes. In an age when hard rock was associated with all things evil, Alice Cooper seemed to epitomise that genre. His style was macabre theatre and he played it up with all his might.

But it wasn’t always that way.

Raised as a pastor’s kid (and the grandson of an evangelist) Alice Cooper grew up in Detroit and Phoenix as Vincent Damon Furnier. He even served in the church as a pre-teen. But as a teen, Furnier wandered off from the church to begin his rock career, eventually adopting the band name “Alice Cooper” as his own. In many respects, he became a completely different person.

Inspired by the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Kinks, and The Who, Cooper’s band jumped quickly into fame in the 1960s and 1970s with showmanship as well as musical talent. Drugs and alcohol came naturally along with the mix, while violent stage antics began to draw more and more attention. Glam-rock costumes, fake blood, torture of baby dolls, and even mock human executions became trademarks, leaving audiences wondering what could be next.

The effect was controversial in public, to say the least, while Cooper’s life was on a downward spiral in private. Hospitalising himself for alcohol addiction in the late 70s, he wasn’t able to kick his habit of illicit substance abuse. Barely able to remember recording some of his albums in the 80s, Cooper was so addicted that his wife filed for divorce (they then reconciled). He began acting in B-grade horror films as well as appearing as a dark personality in many other formats.

Since then, things have drastically changed again.

The faith of his childhood never went away and Cooper eventually hit rock bottom. He looked around himself and saw his drinking buddies, including Jim Morrison and Jimi Hendrix, realised they were dying before they were 30, and didn’t want the same for himself.

When he bottomed out, Cooper knew where to turn. He credits his full recovery to God.

Appearing as King Herod in NBC’s live version of Jesus Christ Superstar for Easter 2018, Alice Cooper’s dark experience likely allows him to identify with Herod’s dark side more than the average person.

Now 70 years old, Cooper declares that he and his wife are both Christians who read the bible and pray every day. Alice’s wife, Sheryl, also grew up as the child of a clergyman. The couple has remained faithful to each other throughout their 42-year marriage and are thankful that their three kids have never had any problems with alcohol or drugs.

Alice Cooper doesn’t consider himself to be particularly “religious” but he does go to church every Sunday. He also heads up a faith-based organisation in Phoenix, called Solid Rock, which ministers to teens in partnership with a local church.

Cooper says that Christianity is all about “dependence on Christ” and a “one-on-one relationship”. And he is adamant that there’s nothing in the bible that says he can’t be a Rock Star.

Check out these lyrics from Cleansed By Fire from the 1994 album “The Last Temptation”:

What about truth

What about life

What about glory

What about Christ

What about peace

What about love

What about faith in God above”¦.

You’re lost

And I’m found

And I’m Heaven Bound

March 24, 2018January 15, 2024

24 of Bonhoeffer’s Most Challenging Quotes

Dietrich Bonhoeffer was a German pastor, theologian, spy, anti-Nazi dissident, key founding member of the Confessing Church as well as one of the most influential spiritual voices across the globe for decades. It’s a good thing for the modern Church that Bonhoeffer was determined in his course.

Bonhoeffer grew up amid the academic circles of the University of Berlin, where his father, Karl Bonhoeffer, was a professor of psychiatry and neurology and was awarded a doctorate in 1927 at the age of only 21. He also studied at Union Theological Seminary in New York from 1930–1931. During that time he attended Abyssinian Baptist Church in Harlem and became deeply interested in the issue of racial injustice.

Bonhoeffer’s involvement in a plot to overthrow Adolf Hitler led to his imprisonment and execution on the 9th April 1945.

More than seventy years after his death, Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s writings on faith, the Church, ethics and the nature of God serve as a touchstone for all of us who seek to understand a Christian’s responsibility in the face of injustice and have gone on to have a profound influence on Western Culture and the legions of Christian thinkers who’ve encountered them ever since. He also remains an important symbol of opposition to Hitler.

Here’s a look back at some of Bonhoeffer’s most powerful quotes.

ON GRACE

“Cheap grace is preaching forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession. Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate.”

ON JUDGING OTHERS

“Judging others makes us blind, whereas love is illuminating. By judging others we blind ourselves to our own evil and to the grace which others are just as entitled to as we are.”

ON LIFE

“Christianity preaches the infinite worth of that which is seemingly worthless and the infinite worthlessness of that which is seemingly so valued.”

ON SIN

“May we be enabled to say ‘No’ to sin and ‘Yes’ to the sinner.”

ON JUDGING

“Judging others makes us blind, whereas love is illuminating. By judging others we blind ourselves to our own evil and to the grace which others are just as entitled to as we are.”

ON SERVING GOD

“We must be ready to allow ourselves to be interrupted by God.”

ON GOD’S LOVE

“God does not love some ideal person, but rather human beings just as we are, not some ideal world, but rather the real world.”

ON GOD’S WILL

“Being a Christian is less about cautiously avoiding sin than about courageously and actively doing God’s will.”

ON SERVING OTHERS

“The Church is the Church only when it exists for others, not dominating, but helping and serving. It must tell men of every calling what it means to live for Christ, to exist for others.”

ON OBEDIENCE

“One act of obedience is worth a hundred sermons.”

ON EVIL

“Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: God will not hold us guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.”

ON AFFIRMATIVE ACTION

“We are not to simply bandage the wounds of victims beneath the wheels of injustice, we are to drive a spoke into the wheel itself.”

ON STANDING UP FOR INJUSTICE

“If I sit next to a madman as he drives a car into a group of innocent bystanders, I can’t, as a Christian, simply wait for the catastrophe, then comfort the wounded and bury the dead. I must try to wrestle the steering wheel out of the hands of the driver.”

ON GRATITUDE

“In normal life we hardly realize how much more we receive than we give, and life cannot be rich without such gratitude. It is so easy to overestimate the importance of our own achievements compared with what we owe to the help of others.”

ON FOLLOWING CHRIST

“When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.”

ON INJUSTICE

“We are not to simply bandage the wounds of victims beneath the wheels of injustice, we are to drive a spoke into the wheel itself.”

ON PEACE

“There is no way to peace along the way of safety. For peace must be dared, it is itself the great venture and can never be safe. Peace is the opposite of security. To demand guarantees is to want to protect oneself. Peace means giving oneself completely to God’s commandment, wanting no security, but in faith and obedience laying the destiny of the nations in the hand of Almighty God, not trying to direct it for selfish purposes. Battles are won, not with weapons, but with God. They are won when the way leads to the cross.”

ON ‘DEFENDING’ THE BIBLE

“Do not try to make the Bible relevant. Its relevance is axiomatic. Do not defend God’s word, but testify to it. Trust to the Word. It is a ship loaded to the very limits of its capacity.”

ON REAL MORALITY

“The ultimate test of a moral society is the kind of world that it leaves to its children.”

ON PEOPLE

“We must learn to regard people less in light of what they do or omit to do, and more in the light of what they suffer.”

ON SPIRITUALITY

“When all is said and done, the life of faith is nothing if not an unending struggle of the spirit with every available weapon against the flesh.”

ON FELLOWSHIP

“The first service that one owes to others in the fellowship consists of listening to them. Just as love of God begins with listening to his word, so the beginning of love for our brothers and sisters is learning to listen to them.”

ON PROOF OF GOD

“A God who let us prove his existence would be an idol.”

ON THE FUTURE

“The ultimate test of a moral society is the kind of world that it leaves to its children.”

March 24, 2018March 24, 2018

What Does The Bible Say About Idleness?

Are you familiar with the English quote, “Idle hands are the workshop of the devil?”

This actually originated from the Bible. This popular proverb was in fact taken from Proverbs 16:27. In The Living Bible, it says, “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop; idle lips are his mouthpiece.”

From Scriptures, we discover that God disapproves of idleness and His ministers share the same sentiment. In Ephesians 5:15 the Bible exhorts us to make the most of every opportunity. The author of 1Thessalonians (possibly, the apostle Paul) pens helpful advice: “

Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” (1 Thessalonians 4:11,12).

1. Idleness results in an unmanaged home.

Ecclesiastes 10:18 says, “Through laziness, the rafters sag; because of idle hands, the house leaks.”

Experience does show that when people neglect to promptly deal with what needs fixing, problems complicate and go from worse to worst.

2. Idle people never amount to anything.

Ecclesiastes 11:6 says, “Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let your hands not be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well.”

It’s in trying that we discover what we can and can’t achieve. It’s in venturing that we discover what will work and what won’t. Who and what we become tomorrow starts today.

3. Idleness leads to disruptive behaviour.

Scriptures connect the idle to the disruptive:

1Thessalonians 5:14 says, “Warn those who are idle and disruptive.”
2Thessalonians 3:11,12 says, “We hear that some among you are idle and disruptive. They are not busy; they are busybodies. Such people, we command and urge in the Lord Jesus Christ to settle down and earn the bread they eat.”
2Thessalonians 3:6 warns us to “keep away from every believer who is idle and disruptive.”
With regards to idle people, the apostle Paul said, “Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers but also busybodies who talk nonsense, saying things they ought not to.” (1Timothy 5:13 ).

These passages speak the truth for the idle avoids work; he is lazy. He consumes his time on pointless things. His mind wanders with no purpose. Idleness can and will cause people to become disruptive or to become busybodies. They will start meddling with things that do not concern them.

Idleness is indeed the workshop of the devil. Evil thoughts creep in and evil desires are birthed when one is not busy doing what is needed and constructive. Forbes rightly puts it this way, “Indolence is the dry rot of a good mind and a good character; the practical uselessness of both. It is the waste of what might be a happy and useful life.”

Sad yet true, idle living is not living. It is a waste of one’s life. It is poor stewardship of all that is entrusted to us. That’s why no child of God should be idle. May no one call us idle today.

“The art of living is the art of bringing dreams and reality together.” – Tom Hodgkinson

March 24, 2018March 24, 2018

What Does The Bible Say About Gentleness?

Gentleness is defined as: “the quality of being kind, tender, or mild-mannered. It is a softness of action or effect; lightness.”

From E. Lockhart we can deduce this definition: Gentleness is being a little kinder than we have to.” From Scriptures, we also learn about gentleness. It is one quality that cannot be absent if you call yourself a child of God.

Here’s what the Bible says about gentleness:

1. God wants us teach and correct with gentleness.

II Timothy 2:24 says, “God’s people must not be quarrelsome; they must be gentle, patient teachers of those who are wrong.”

1 Peter 3:15 says, “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”

It’s hard for someone to listen and consider what you’re saying if you speak in a raised and exasperated tone. Without gentleness, you’ll just come across as self-righteous and opinionated.

2. Gentleness makes you willing to listen to others.

James 3:17 says, “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure and full of quiet gentleness. Then it is peace-loving and courteous. It allows discussion and is willing to yield to others.”

We must always remember that our mind falters. We don’t know everything. We could be wrong even when we are absolutely sure we are right. It is because our minds are imperfect. We don’t always perceive and process thoughts rightly. With gentleness of spirit, we learn to leave room for error and discussion. With gentleness of spirit, our hearts are positioned to accept and defer to others when needed.

3. Gentleness is a mark of true Christianity.

Colossians 3:12 says, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

Mark Twain said, “Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” Kindness is gentleness. Kindness speaks and demonstrates clearer than our words and other deeds ever will. Do one unkind act and you will discredit your reputation in an instant. Why? Because kindness is love. 1Corinthians 13:4 says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.” Love and kindness go together. You cannot love without being kind.

5. Gentleness is THE fruit of the Spirit.

Galatians 5:22 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, gentleness (kindness)”¦”

We can exhibit gentleness when we allow the Holy Spirit to have His way in us. When it is lacking in our lives, it means we are not walking in the Spirit. To be marked with harshness means we are living a superficial Christian life.

5. Gentleness is a response to Christ’s mercy and forgiveness.

Ephesians 4:32 says, “Be gentle (kind) and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” As we have experienced God’s forgiveness, in gratefulness we ought to afford the same blessing to others.

God’s children are to live a life of gentleness. May our resolve be as what Max Lucado declared:

“I choose gentleness… Nothing is won by force.

I choose to be gentle.

If I raise my voice may it be only in praise.

If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer.

If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.”