Tag: Software

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Marriage 2.0: Software Review

A newly married man wrote this to a computer *Data Analyst*

Dear Data Analyst

I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from *Girlfriend 7.0* to *Wife 1.0* following acceptance of the oath from the KJV Bible Instruction Manual and found that the new *Wife 1.0* program began unexpected Child Processing? *Wife 1.0* has also taken up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn’t explicitly mentioned in the _KJV instruction manual?

In addition *Wife 1.0* installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems initialisation at the start of each day and then it constantly monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as *”Boys’ Night out 2.5″* and *”Golf 5.3″* no longer run, and crashes the system whenever selected.

Attempting to operate selected *”Soccer 6.3″* always fails and *”Church 5.1″* and *”Shopping 7.1″* runs instead.

I cannot seem to keep *Wife 1.0* in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favorite applications. Be it online or offline.
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I am thinking of going back to *”Girlfriend 7.0″*, but the uninstall button doesn’t work on this program and after reading the instruction guide seems to be prohibited by KJV Manual 9.0. Can you please help?

The Systems Analyst replied:

*Dear Customer,*

This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding of the functions of the *Wife 1.0 program and a lack of understanding of the KJV Bible Instruction Manual*.

Many customers upgrade from _Girlfriend 7.0_ to _Wife 1.0_ after acceptance of the oath from the KJV Bible Instruction Manual thinking that _Wife 1.0_ is merely a *UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM.* This is not the case!

Actually, *Wife 1.0* is an _OPERATING SYSTEM_ designed by its *Creator* to run everything on your current platform. You must therefore review the KJV Bible Instruction Manual for daily guidance.

You will not be able to purge *Wife 1.0* and still convert back to _Girlfriend 7.0_, as *Wife 1.0* was not designed to do this and it is impossible to _uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed. The KJV Bible Instruction Manual only permits one installation. There maybe one or two exceptions to this rule, but you do not meet the criteria.

Some people have tried to install _Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0_ but have ended up with even more problems. *_(See Manual under Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors’ Fees/)._* Plus the instruction manual clearly states whoever uninstalls Wife 1.0_ , except for sexual immorality, and installs another, commits adultery.”

Having *Wife 1.0* installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and learn to deal with the situation as best as you can. You will find that the more closely you adhere to the insttruction manual and operate in accordance with the authors example the better your experience will be.

When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the………
*C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE AND PRAY.EXE* Program and avoid attempting to use the _*Esc-Key_ for it will freeze the entire system.

It may be necessary to run *C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME AND PRAY.EXE* a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal.

Although *Wife 1.0,* demands respect, love, and attention,*Wife 1.0,* can be very rewarding.

To get the most out of *Wife 1.0,* , consider buying additional Software such as *”FAMILY PRAYER TIME 1.0, Flowers 2.0″* and *”Chocolates 5.0″*,*”Attention 6.0″* and *”HUGS\ KISSES 7.0″* or *”TENDERNESS\ UNDERSTANDING and SHARE HOUSEHOLD DUTIES 10.0″* or *”even Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1″* _(if Child processing has already started)._

*DO NOT* under any circumstances install *”Secretary 2.1″* _(Short Skirt Version)_ or *”One Nightstand 3.2″*, as this is not a supported Application for *Wife 1.0* and the system will almost certainly *CRASH*. In addition this could disqualify you from upgrading to, HEAVEN .11.0.

PS’ When my relationship crashed, I took a hard look at the conventional wisdom. Then did a reboot and emerged with a partnership that was built to last.

*BEST WISHES!*

Yours,”
Systems Analyst.

*#To all husbands/ future husbands*

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Does ‘The Image of God’ Extend to Robots, Too?

Inside a railway arch in Brixton, a piece of history was brought back to life. First built in 1928 by Captain Richards & A.H. Reffell, Eric is one of the UK’s first robots.  Eric’s design was relatively simple. He was automated, but the interesting thing about Eric  is how much extra stuff people  read into him.  Ingenious electrical instruments enabled Eric to hear questions and answer in a human voice.

On September 28 1928 Eric stood up at the Royal Horticultural Hall, bowed, looked right and left and moved his hands as he proceeded to give an opening address as sparks flashed from his teeth.

The New York Press described Eric  as the “perfect man,“ built less than a decade after the word robot was used for the first time, Eric toured  the world with his makers but then vanished, seemingly forever.

Nobody knows if the robot was thrown out, or lost, but it’s apparent that Eric once lauded for his  technical prowess became an early victim of technological obsolescence. He may  have  no longer been needed or wanted even though he may have  still been in working order.

In May 2016, over 800 Kickstarters  investors campaigned to bring Eric back to life. Roboticist and artist Giles Walker created a replica of Eric using just a handful of archived news cuttings, pictures, and video.  The robot is built with the same finesse as modern robots but purposefully lacks their capabilities.  Eric is controlled by a pre-programmed sequence, using software similar to that used for controlling lights in theatres.

By resurrecting Eric, Russell and Walker want to make people reevaluate the place of robots within our history and society at large.

Commissioned by the Science Museum and funded through a successful £51,000 Kickstarter campaign, Eric is on display at the South Kensington museum ahead of a Robots exhibition in 2017 and will thereafter tour the world just like he did more than 90 years ago.

The new exhibition will feature more than 100 robots, from a 16th-century mechanical monk to robots from science fiction and modern-day research labs.

In whose image are robots made?

According  to Russell, Curator, London Science Museum the answer seems to be “ourselves.”

Robots are almost like mirrors, they reflect back on ourselves, tell us who we are  Ben Russell, Curator, London Science Museum

As research into artificial intelligence continues, we will continue on the path of making artificial intelligence (AI) in our image. But can Christian thought provide an alternative approach to how robots are made?

The original Eric is a product of a time when an intelligent robot was still a far-off possibility. At the time, filmmakers and audiences treated these robots instrumentally; there was little sympathy for the robot dead.

Times, however, have changed. Christopher Orr, writing in The Atlantic, notes that there is a major philosophical shift in the newest version of Westworld: A shift from concern for the creators, made of flesh and blood, to concern for the created, made of steel and silicon.

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15 Shocking Project Management Statistics

15 Shocking Project Management Statistics

The project management landscape is changing  with an increased emphasis on productivity, reporting, and information technology. A number of studies have been completed that look into the success and  failure rates of projects.

Below are  15 shocking  statistics that reveal how project management has changed and is performing across various industries over the last 5 years.

  1. There is  projected to be 15.7 million new project management roles to  be added globally across seven project-intensive industries by 2020 reaching an economic impact of over $18 trillion, across seven project-intensive industries  including  Manufacturing, Finance & Insurance, Information Services, Utilities, Business Services, Oil & Gas  and  Construction (Project Management Institute)
  2. 75% of IT executives believe their projects are “doomed from the start. (Geneca)
  3. The healthcare industry is projected to increase project management roles by 30%,  a higher growth rate than any current project intensive industry between 2010 and  2020. (Project Management Institute)
  4. A third of all projects were successfully completed on time and on budget over the past year. (Standish Group)
  5. 80% of “high-performing” projects are led by a certified project manager.  (PricewaterhouseCoopers, Insights and Trends: Current Programme and Project Management Practices 2012)
  6. One in six IT projects have an average cost overrun of 200%.  (Harvard Business Review 2004)
  7. 44% of project managers use no software, even though PWC found that the use of commercially available PM software increases performance and satisfaction. (Pricewaterhouse Coopers)
  8. More than 90% of organizations perform some type of project postmortem or closeout retrospective. (The Standish Group: CHAOS Research Report 2013)
  9. On average, it takes 7 years in the profession to go from entry-level to managing large, complex projects.  (ESI International: Annual Salary Survey 2013)
  10. The average large IT project runs 45% over budget, 7% over time, and delivers 56% less value than expected. (Project Management Institute: Pulse of the Profession 2015)
  11. Only 64% of projects meet their goals. (Project Management Institute: Pulse of the Profession 2015)
  12. 60% of companies don’t measure ROI on projects. (KPMG New Zealand: Project Management Survey 2010)
  13. The United States economy loses $50-$150 billion per year due to failed IT projects. (Gallup Business Review)
  14. In just a 12 month period 49% of organizations had suffered a recent project failure.  In the same period only 2% of organizations reported that all of their projects achieved the desired benefits.  86% of organizations reported a shortfall of at least 25% of targeted benefits across their portfolio of projects and many organizations failed to measure benefits so they are unaware of their true status in terms of benefits realization. (KPMG – Global IT Project Management Survey 2005)
  15. According to an IBM study, only 40% of projects meet schedule, budget and quality goals. (Harvard Business Review 2004)

If you have any other project management statistics please share them with us.

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66% of IT Projects Fail

Is Britain a nation of slient Christians?

Only one in three software projects will turn out to be successful. According to Standish Group’s 2015 Chaos report, 66% of technology projects (based on the analysis of 50,000 projects worldwide) end in partial or total failure. More surprisingly, these statistics have been the same for the last five years, the report shows. Furthermore, 17% of large IT projects go so badly that they can threaten the very existence of  a company.

On Average, Large It Projects Run 45% over Budget and 7% over Time, While Delivering 56% Less Value than Predicted

Despite such failures, huge sums continue to be invested in IT projects and written off. For example the cost of project failure across the European Union was ┚¬142 billion in 2004.

It Projects Always Come with an Element of Risk, but There Are Huge Gains to Be Had If We Can Just Avoid Some of the Factors That Contribute Frequently to Project Failure

What makes a IT project successful, though?

According to the Standish Group, a successful project is on time, on budget and has satisfactory results (value, user and sponsor satisfaction, and meets target requirements). Other measures of success are widely known and accepted as true such as getting requirements right, providing effective leadership, and having full support and engagement from sponsors and users. Without these, it’s unlikely that any project would succeed.

But there’s more to success than what is widely known and, apparently, rarely followed. To reduce the risk of failure for your tech project, here are  six key actions to take on the road to success.

1. Executive Vision and Involvement

Without a Executive Senior Sponsor Its Easy for Projects to Fail with the Organizational Resistance That Accompanies Large Change

Executive involvement is a primary variable in predicting the success of an IT project.   Having a leadership team aligned across an organization articulating the purpose, value, and rationale for a project goes a long way towards getting stakeholders and end-users pulling the proverbial rope in the same direction.

2. Have a clear view of scope and timetable

Oftentimes, a tech project flops because its developers fail to plan and rush forward with  an idea. However, some project  managers plan so meticulously that they end up falling behind and lose momentum. The best approach is somewhere in between.

Interviewing team members, documenting requirements, prioritizing what is “mission critical” versus “nice to have,” getting agreement across stakeholders can feel like a never-ending cycle.   As a result, requirement gathering has fallen out of fashion with many organizations  in the past few years.

However, the ideal starting point for a successful technology project is to have a set of fundamental requirements with sufficient detail to develop against.

Requirement Gathering Is Labour-intensive and Challenging but Remains the Roadmap and Measuring Stick for Software Projects

This approach allows you to maintain sight of the business benefits as well as engaging stakeholders and responding to their feedback.  In combination with a  clear business case, a  well-defined set of requirements also simplifies design and testing, two areas where projects tend to go  sideways.

Ensure that requirements for the project are clearly defined and agreed upon among stakeholders and that you have a way to track, measure, and manage changes in requirements as appropriate during the project.

3. Define how you will deliver

When it comes to delivering a major project, one size does not always fit all. All products are customizable to some degree, so what might have worked  in one company may not work in another company.

That being said, why reinvent the wheel if it’s already proven successful?  Sometimes it  can be more beneficial to  use an existing  off the shelf solution. Whichever direction you take,  choose the delivery mode that works best for your company.

4. Risk Identification and Management

Every project has risk and  there are many  factors out of your control. People leave the organization, for better or worse, leadership changes,   budgets get cut, however, many risks  to projects can be mitigated or even eliminated with some forethought and on-going management.    For example, do you have the resources you need to deliver the project (resource risk).   Are project goals clearly understood and requirements clearly defined (scope risk).   Do you have a realistic project plan and timeline (time risk).

Mitigating Risk Is a Combination of Science and Art, and Always a Balancing Process

5. Test your product again and again

A technology project is something that should overall support your business. It should not be something that dictates and forces you to  change your operations. If this is happening, you should shift gears and focus on tweaking the technology, rather than lowering expectations and adopting less ideal requirements.

Adequate testing is a must for any tech project. While some features may be fine with automated testing, the best approach is to have a dedicated testing team. Testing activities should mirror those with the development team throughout the project’s lifetime. With thorough testing, a project should deliver with less design flaws or missing requirements.

6. Prioritize simplicity and performance

Developers often leave the external look and feel of a product to the wayside thinking these things are not necessities for the consumer to enjoy. However, user experience is absolutely critical to the success of the project.

Developers must consider things like storage, network requirements, processing speeds and overall performance in order to satisfy the customer. If users are going to have to wait for an extended period to allow information to load, there must be a good reason for the wait, otherwise they won’t return for future products.

Simplification and Improved Efficiency Is What Adds Value

Ultimately, using the product should be a smooth and intuitive experience. Additionally, tools and alternative routes must be placed logically without being intrusive. The process can be complicated, but the finished product should emit simplicity. After all, that’s what makes companies like Apple so successful. Simplification and improved efficiency is what adds value.

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Top 10 Project Management Myths Debunked

Since the dawn of time, mankind has used myths to make sense of the uncertainty that surrounds us.  In the early 1990s  a lot of  people believed that project management was the best kept secret in business.  However,  because project management was not  seen as a  prevailing profession at that time, it suffered from a lack of awareness  which was  in a sense, a double edged sword. Those who were knowledgeable in the practice of project management became extreamly valuable to organisations and pioneers for  the profession.

These early adopters were able to convince organisations that project management practitioners were needed.  Myths around project management began to form in the business community  and as the role of the  project manager was unclear, questions were raised as to what project management was  and what it could offer organisations.

The definition of the word myth is a “widely held, but false belief or idea.” Here, we’re going to examine 10 of the most pervasive PM myths that have emerged.

Myth #1 – Contingency pool is  redundant  

This is one of the most ‘mythical’ myths that has plagued the industry  for a long time. Coupled  with the tendency to presume that ‘real work’ is tantamount to implementation or building something concrete and you have the perfect recipe for project disaster.  The thought pattern behind this approach typically originates from budget constraints and/or having unrealistic expectations. As we all know, or should know, the unexpected happens quite regularly. An effective contingency plan is important as it aims to protect that which has value (e.g., data), prevent or minimise disruption (e.g., product lifecycle), and provide post-event feedback for analysis (e.g., how did we fare? did we allocate funds correctly?).

Myth #2 – Project Management software is too expensive

If your idea of project management software involves purchasing servers, and purchasing a software application from a major vendor for a small practice with 10  practitioners  then, yes, it  is too expensive. If, however, you have gone cloud and elected to use a powerful web-based project management solution (such as Smartsheet), then you are likely to save thousands of pounds while reaping the benefits of a pay-as-you-go price structure. The present, and future, lie in cloud solutions that provide equal, or superior, functionality at a fraction of the cost.

Myth #3 – Project Management methodologies will slow us down

Project  managers  have  a reputation of using  process-intensive  methodologies  that favour ideology over pragmatism. In some instances this may, indeed, be the case when  there is a mismatch between a specific project management approach and the organisation’s acutall needs (e.g., a process-driven method, such as PRINCE2, may not be appropriate for a slightly chaotic environment that favours an adaptive approach, such as Scrum). So, in sum, put down the paint roller (“Project Management isn’t for us!”) and take out your fine-bristled brush (“The Critical-Chain method may not be our cup of tea, but Agile on the other hand”¦”).

Myth #4 – Facts and figures are more important than feelings and perceptions

While facts are very important, projects are often derailed and sabotaged because of false perceptions.  The PM must pay attention to both fact and fiction to navigate through turbulent  organisational change.

Myth #5 – Project managers need to be detail oriented and not strategic in nature

While it is of the utmost importance for the project manager to understand how to read the details of the project, they must also understand how the project supports organisational objectives.  Having a strategic perspective adds great value to the skill-set of the project manager.

Myth #6  Rely on the experts in everything that you do

It is true, we do need to rely on the experts but our trust can not be a blind faith.  The job of the project managers in this area is twofold.  First we must extract information and second we must verify that the information is accurate.  A good example of this is asking a planner  to provide an estimate on the effort required to perform a task.  In some instances team members forget to include tasks which ultimately results in a faulty estimate.

Myth #7  All the battles have to be fought and won so that we can succeed

Project managers sometimes make the assumption that they need to stand firm to get the job done, however, coming to compromise  on a particular issue is often a better course of action  in order to  win the war.

Myth #8 Project Managers  can wear multiple hats  

Wearing different hats can be extremely confusing.  This is especially true if the project manager is asked to be a business analyst or technical expert on top of serving in their PM role.  They end up doing  both roles with mediocrity.  When we “wear two hats” we essentially tell ourselves that both hats fit on one head at the same time. However, what happens if the demands of two roles conflict  and what assurances do we have that we’re managing the inherent conflict of multiple roles  and the  risks the  roles introduce? Sadly, multiple roles become more common as we move up the management hierarchy in an organisation, and that’s exactly where potential conflicts of interest can do the most harm.

Myth #9  Once the risk register is created, it’s full speed ahead

Risk management provides a forward-looking radar. We can use it to scan the uncertain future to reveal things that could affect us, giving us sufficient time to prepare in advance. We can develop contingency plans even for so-called uncontrollable risks, and be ready to deal with likely threats or significant opportunities.  Too often, it’s not until a catastrophic event occurs and significantly impacts project progress that ongoing risk reviews are conducted.

Myth #10 Project managers can not be effective in their role unless they have specific technical expertise in the given field that the project falls  within

You don’t need to be an engineer to manage a construction project or a IT  technician to manage a software development project.  All you need is a  fundamental  understanding with strong PM skills to manage  the team.  Experience in the field helps but does not guarantee success.

Project management is challenging enough without the myths. The profession has come a long way since the 1990s and some of these myths are fading. However, we still see remnants of them in one form or another.  Great projects cut through false assumptions and confusion, allowing their teams to make smart decisions based on reality.

These are just 10 project management myths, what are yours?  

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Manage Your Project More Effectively Now

There are a few who get project management right from the outset, but for many it’s a minefield. In theory, project management seems easy, but it’s not as straightforward as it seems. If you’re like the majority of people, you follow what seems like a simple project management process. You start by setting your budget, you choose the right people to join the team, and hope the project gets completed without too many hitches along the way.

But, realistically speaking, project management is nothing like this – it’s hardly ever so straightforward. Mistakes are made. You might choose the wrong people to complete the project. Your team might have no idea what’s expected of them or what the project goals are, or in some cases they might even receive conflicting information, which puts the whole project in jeopardy. Sometimes the scope of the project changes, and because of everything else that’s going on, your team is unable to fulfill the requirements and meet the project deadlines.

It happens, and you’ve got to be prepared for any situation while working together towards the common goal – successfully completing the project.  

Don’t throw in the towel just yet. It might seem daunting, but there are few surefire tricks of the trade which businesses and project managers can implement to better their chances of successfully completing a project on time and within budget.

1. Know the Project Details Well

Before starting, you need to create a thorough project scope that outlines every single thing. This then needs to be approved by every stakeholder involved.

Your scope needs to have as much detail as possible such as the short-term milestones, deliverable dates, and a budget outline. It makes sense really. The more detail it includes will improve your odds when it comes to completing the project successfully.

What’s more, you’ll also improve your relationship with your client throughout the whole project process from the beginning right through to the end. Of course every project will encounter a few changes along the way – this is the norm, but having a detailed plan will help you manage your client better when something is off course.

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Choose your Project Team Members and Size Wisely

2. Choose your Project Team Members and Size Wisely

Naturally, if you want your project to be a winner, you need the right people for the job, which includes having the right project manager on board. Keep your team as small as possible – size does matter; so don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.

The smaller the team, the better the communication. It also eases the stress and takes the pressure off the project manager. With a smaller team made up of the right people, the project manager will be able to organise their group without losing sight of all the details and work that’s needed doing. So, if you really want to have an effective project, limit your group’s size and only use those people and their skills that can benefit the project.

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3. Highlight your Expectations from the Outset

You need to outline what you expect and what the client expects, which includes all the milestones, from the very beginning. Setting more milestones more frequently will allow you to follow the project’s progress more effectively. This way you’ll be able to jump on things quickly when they begin to go off scope, allowing you and your team to remain on target and on time.

Setting frequent milestones in a project will also allow you to review your spending and the investment thus far, which in turn will help you stay within the budget.

Milestones remove any ambiguity. They allow people to stay on target and there’s less risk of derailing the project.

Milestone setting should be a team effort. Everyone should be on board, so there won’t be any excuses later on down the line.

4. Does your Team Know what They’re Doing?  

It may sound like a given, but it’s really important to be crystal clear from the beginning regarding people’s roles in the project. In other words, you need to highlight who is responsible for what, and what their deadline or deadlines are.

Things can get complicated with many people working on the same task. Sometimes things get misinterpreted or lost in translation. Avoid anyone being confused by clearly stating who should do what right from start, and make sure you enforce accountability.

You don’t need to worry about manually managing such tasks, as there are plenty of easy-to-use online task management programmes that can do this for you, so embrace technology and ease your pressure.

You may think it’s a waste of time spelling it all out, but this ensures that the full scope of the project is understood, people are clear of their role and individual and collaborative timelines. This is the key to keeping people on task and motivated.

5. Stop Micromanaging

It’s important to constantly touch base with your team members. However, there’s a fine line between supporting them and breathing down their necks. Give them space instead of micromanaging. Empower your team, trust them, and you’ll get their best work.

6. Use a Reliable System to Manage the Project

Communication is key. Most people rely on emailing, but when it comes to managing a big project with a number of different people working on it, this can hinder the project’s progress. Constantly referring back to old emails and previous correspondence is only going to waste precious time. Use software that keeps everything in one place from communication to any project information and updates. This will save you and your team a lot of time and money.

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Motivate your Team

7. Motivate your Team

Everyone works better with positive reinforcement. Set milestones and reward when they’re reached. Your milestones will keep all people on track. Celebrate milestones together, but be sure to also recognise those who can’t meet them.

8. Frequent Short Meets to Stay on Track

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It’s a project with many people collaborating, so holding regular meetings is a must. This is the only way to ensure that everyone and the project are on track. But you need to keep it short and sweet. Don’t meet for the sake of meeting. Have an agenda and stick to it. If you’re doing your project virtually, it’s even more important to touch base on a regular basis, so keep those communication lines open.

People do tend to go on at times when given the floor, so give everyone a set time to speak and make sure you all stick to it.

9. Allow Time for Change

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No project ever runs 100% smoothly and specifications do change along the way. So to avoid the unnecessary stress and running around frantically, do some forward thinking, and set aside a certain amount of time for any changes in the scope – you’ll thank yourself for doing so in the end!

 

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