Forgiveness – A Heaven or Hell Issue

heaven or hell

Bitterness is a poison that can destroy you, and it never destroys the person it’s aimed at. A way to get through bitterness is to forgive. In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can’t get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others.

Dr. Les Carter says, “I recall one woman who came to me ten years after her divorce. She was talking about her son’s marriage and her daughter’s graduation. Her ex was going to be at both. She had never resolved the fact that he had rejected her. She kept going over it in her mind, ‘How could he have done this to me? Can’t he see that he just ripped apart a family?’ Her children would say, ‘Mom, we know the facts. We know he did it. We can’t go back and rewrite history.’ She would always come back with those infamous words, ‘Yes, but . . .'”

That is a woman who is so stuck in the past, it’s as if she is willing to hold on to that divorce, to hold on to that anger, as being the defining element in her personality.

Today, if you do not forgive the person who has hurt you, you are making it impossible to receive God’s forgiveness for you. You do not want to cut yourself off from God’s forgiveness. You need that forgiveness for your own freedom and healing, and to release God’s power in your life.


“…If you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God’s part” (Matthew 6:14-15 Msg).

Let’s Pray
Yahweh, I do not want unforgiveness, bitterness, and resentment to define my personality and to make me miss out on the kingdom. Father, with Your help, I can be free from this. God, lead me through every thought and every decision and cleanse my mind, in Christ’s Name! Amen.

Mum Shocked After One Twin is Born with Albinism: Real Life Story

Albinism is the “congenital absence of any pigmentation or coloration in a person, animal or plant, resulting in white hair, feathers, scales and skin and pink eyes in mammals, birds, reptiles, amphibians and fish and other small invertebrates as well.” Varied use and interpretation of the terms mean that written reports of albinistic animals can be difficult to verify.

For ages, Judith had a feeling that she would struggle to become pregnant. There wasn’t a medical explanation for this — it was simply a niggling fear.

She and her husband struggled to believe they would ever become parents after years went by without her becoming pregnant. “I found myself getting anxious and desperate,” Judith first wrote on Love What Matters.

“The fear remained no matter how hard I tried to stay positive. However, Eight years down the line, my husband and I decided to go for our second round of IVF. The first of which failed, as well as other various procedures and fertility treatments. Every ultrasound visit after that was horror”

Judith

The couple could hardly contain their joy when that second round of IVF proved successful.

Judith was carrying twins — a boy, Kamis, and a girl, Kachi.

It felt remarkable that after all these years, their aspirations and dreams of a family were about to be real.

However, mum’s joy quickly turned to horror as doctors broke the news that Kachi was “at risk and might not make it”. “Every ultrasound visit after that was a nightmare as Kachi was far behind in growth whiles Kamsi did great.

“Finally, at 37 weeks, I had to be induced immediately because I was told that Kachi had stopped growing..” After the birth Nurses let Judith hold her daughter briefly before she was whisked to the NICU.

“The first time I saw her, I wondered if the nurse was handing me my baby, or someone else’s,” Judith said. “I waited a few seconds for someone to tell me there was a mix-up?” “Soon the joy of seeing them both healthy surpassed any other feeling at that instant.”

“How did I get black and white twins?”

Several days later Judith and her husband were told that their baby girl had albinism.

“I loved my princess like every mother would love her baby but worried about her condition,” Judith said.

“I worried about her future, how society would treat her, how she’ll be accepted.

“Gradually, worry turned to sadness and I started questioning “I envied other black babies and thought, ‘Why me? Why was I the one to have an albino baby?’

“How did I get black and white twins?”

“I threw the braille sheets in the garbage” 

Unfortunately, medical professionals were quick to affirm Judith’s worst fears and told her that Kachi would struggle to see and would likely need to learn to read braille. 

“I couldn’t imagine Kachi reading with braille and threw the braille sheets in the garbage.” She said

“She’s so smart and has a strong personality. She knows what she wants and will always go for it.
“I always tell her how beautiful she is, because she really is. 

“I’m not sure she`s aware of her uniqueness at the moment, but eventually she’ll know.”

“It’s my responsibility to educate her and teach her to love herself no matter what.

Albinism

Albinism affects the production of melanin, the pigment that colours skin, hair and eyes. It’s a lifelong condition, but it doesn’t get worse over time.

People with albinism have a reduced amount of melanin, or no melanin at all. This can affect their colouring and their eyesight.

Albinism is caused by faulty genes that a child inherits from their parents.

Symptoms of albinism

Hair and skin colour

People with albinism often have white or very light blonde hair, although some have brown or ginger hair. The exact colour depends on how much melanin their body produces.

Very pale skin that burns easily in the sun and doesn’t usually tan is also typical of albinism.

Picture of a young girl with albinism

Eye colour

Someone with albinism can have pale blue, grey or brown eyes. Eye colour depends on the type of albinism and the amount of melanin. People from ethnic groups with darker pigmentation tend to have darker coloured eyes.

Eye problems

The reduced amount of melanin can also cause other eye problems. This is because melanin is involved in the development of the retina, the thin layer of cells at the back of the eye.

Possible eye problems linked to albinism include:

  • poor eyesight — either short-sightedness or long-sightedness, and low vision (sight loss that can’t be corrected)
  • astigmatism — where the cornea (clear layer at the front of the eye) isn’t perfectly curved or the lens is an abnormal shape, causing blurred vision
  • photophobia — where the eyes are sensitive to light
  • nystagmus — where the eyes move involuntarily from side to side, causing reduced vision; you don’t see the world as “wobbling” because your brain adapts to your eye movement
  • squint — where the eyes point in different directions

Some young children with albinism may appear clumsy because problems with their eyesight can make it difficult for them to perform certain movements, such as picking up an object. This should improve as they get older.

How albinism is inherited

The two main types of albinism are:

  • oculocutaneous albinism (OCA) — the most common type, affecting the skin, hair and eyes
  • ocular albinism (OA) — a rarer type that mainly affects the eyes

Autosomal recessive inheritance

In most cases, including all types of OCA and some types of OA, albinism is passed on in an autosomal recessive inheritance pattern. This means a child has to inherit two copies of the faulty gene (one from each parent) to have the condition.

If both parents carry the gene, there’s a 1 in 4 chance that their child will have albinism and a 1 in 2 chance that their child will be a carrier. Carriers don’t have albinism but can pass on the faulty gene.

X-linked inheritance

Some types of OA are passed on in an X-linked inheritance pattern. This pattern affects boys and girls differently: girls who inherit the faulty gene become carriers and boys who inherit the faulty gene will get albinism.

When a mother is a carrier of an X-linked type of albinism, each of her daughters has a 1 in 2 chance of becoming a carrier and each of her sons has a 1 in 2 chance of having albinism.

When a father has an X-linked type of albinism, his daughters will become carriers, and his sons won’t have albinism and won’t be carriers.

Read more about how mutations are passed on.

Genetic counselling

If you have a history of albinism in your family or you have a child with the condition, you may want to talk to your GP about getting a referral for genetic counselling.

A genetic counsellor provides information, support and advice about genetic conditions. For example, you can discuss with them how you inherited albinism and the chances of passing it on.

Read more about genetic testing and counselling.

Diagnosing albinism

Albinism is usually obvious from a baby’s appearance when they’re born. Your baby’s hair, skin and eyes may be examined to look for signs of missing pigment.

As albinism can cause a number of eye problems, your baby may be referred to an eye specialist (ophthalmologist) for tests to check for conditions such as nystagmus, squint and astigmatism.

Electrodiagnostic testing is also sometimes used to help diagnose albinism. This is where small electrodes are stuck to the scalp to test the connections of the eyes to the part of the brain that controls vision.

Fathers to the Fatherless

Fathers to the Fatherless

Father’s Day didn’t have any meaning to me for most of my life, my biological father was abusive, and it was just a bad reminder of the past, but Father’s Day brings new meaning since I met my spiritual father.

According to the U.S. Census, approximately 15 million people in the U.S are fatherless. My earthly father was not a good father at all. He provided none of the essentials that I needed as a child or even now as an adult. My relationship with my biological father was anything but loving and trusting, and for the first 9 years of my life, it was torture.

After being placed in a foster home for a substantial portion of my childhood even there I did not have a father. At church, I was told that God was my father,  but to me, that did not equate because of the experiences that I had already had. How could I see God as my Father when my biological Father caused me so much pain and abuse?

I have always loved God but accepting him as a Father was difficult. I had such a tainted view of what a Father really was, and I couldn’t grasp the magnitude of God’s love for me as Father.

It took the love of a spiritual father to change my mind about what a father was. A spiritual father is a father figure within the Body of Christ.  

It was because of his relentless love and acceptance that I could finally see the Heavenly Father in a true light.

Seeing A Loving Father for the First Time

 My Spiritual Father

I did not know I needed a Father figure, but God knew I needed a Father figure. It was amazing, God gave me so much more than just a Father, he gave me a Dad. We have a trusting, healthy father/daughter relationship and I thank God every day for that blessing in my life.

I can’t thank him enough for his love, and commitment to me. My Dad corrects me when I am wrong, and he forgives me even when I don’t deserve it. That’s the thing, a real father always forgives, and moves on, just like our Heavenly Father. A Spiritual father will always express and exemplify knowledge, wisdom, and understanding. A spiritual father will always give sound counsel and pour out blessings.  A spiritual father will nurture and protect. He never leaves you even when you have messed up. A spiritual father will use those moments as teaching moments. A spiritual father should always be a representation of the heavenly father.

My Dad has also taught me a few other things, like how a real father is supposed to be.

1. My Father will never leave me.  

God promises, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5).

God is deeply, unshakably committed to you. You never have to ask whether he will stay or leave.

My Dad shows me that a real Father will always be there no matter what. I never have to worry that he will get tired of me one day and be done with me, that’s not how a father/daughter relationship works.

2. The Father knows what I need.

Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” (Matthew 6:8)

My spiritual father always seems to know what I need spiritual and mentally and offers loving advice with respect to who I am a daughter.

3. The Father takes great delight in his children.

God says, in Isaiah 43:44″ you all “his children” are precious in my eyes,”

Without any love or encouragement from my dad, I could easily question whether I was loved at all. I used to constantly battle with how much I was worth.

 4. The Father loves Unconditionally

 (Romans 5:6–8) He is a hope for the abandoned, a refuge for the fearful, a Father to the fatherless.

Thankfully, our heavenly Father’s love for us is not conditional. He does not love us based on what we do to deserve his love. God loves us just because he loves us. Even when we’re disobedient and rebellious, He loves us.

God reaches out to you in great love even when you are at your worst.

Father’s hold such a vital role in our lives. In a Christian home, they are the beginning foundation of what our relationship will look like with our Heavenly Father.

If you don’t have a Father, consider reaching out to someone that has a close relationship with God and accept them as a mentor and if you are approached reciprocate. Maybe you don’t have a father, but you have a person in your life that has made an impact in your life, thank them for this.

Lastly, remember we all have our Father in Heaven. You can’t get any better than that. Make sure you honor him this Sunday and every day after.

Happy Father’s Day!

Who am I in Christ?

Who Does God Say That I Am?

Have you ever asked yourself, ‘Who am I really? It’s an age-old question that many people ask and some never figure it out, our identities seem to tie in to what we are to certain people and how we live our lives.

After growing up in a broken home, and spending some years in a foster home, I spent many years of my life trying to figure out who I was; really. Was I really someone’s child, someone that didn’t fight for me while I was in a foster home for years? In the foster home, I was not really a daughter, I was a foster kid. I didn’t really belong, it was a “temporary” home for years. I was another mouth to feed in the home. I became a wife at a young age and for many years that seemed to be my identity but deep down that never satisfied me.

I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a friend, even a patient.

All of my identities, everything that I believe I am, are all dependent on somebody and something else. Don’t get me wrong these are important roles in my life and I get to share my gifts and leave my mark in each of these lives but all of these are just roles in my life and are just a part of what makes me, me. What if all of these people were suddenly gone, what would be left of me? The question still plagues me, who am I?

Gifts and Talents

I believe my true identity goes much deeper than the just mere connection with someone else. God gives us all gifts and I soon realized that I could link up all of my gifts and talents in some way to my roles in my life. Character is the core of who you really are because when your back is up against the wall and you have no choice this is when your true self will show.

I am a good listener. Often times people call me to vent or to give them my opinion but most of the time I listen. People need that, they need for people to listen to them. Most everyone seems to be in a hurry these days and take very little time to slow down and listen. Listening comes easy for me.  Hebrews 2:1(ESV) says;

“We must pay the most careful attention, therefore, to what we  

have heard, so that we do not drift away.”

So, because of this scripture, I see God also wants me to be a good listener to Him as well.

I am  Loyal.  I am loyal to my husband, loyal to my children, loyal to my family even though at times they may try my patience. I am loyal to my Heavenly Father, I trust Him, serve Him, rely on Him and seek Him daily. Matthew 24: 45-46 (ESV) says;

Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom his master  

has set over his household, to give them their (physical, and spiritual)  

food at the proper time?  Blessed is that servant whom his master  

will find so doing when he comes.”

I demonstrate my loyalty to God and loyalty to those who He has called me to serve.

I am trustworthy. I don’t gossip, I don’t tell someone else’s story if told something in confidence I keep it in confidence. I have learned to trust God and I believe He trusts me.

Psalm 91:2 (ESV) says;    

 I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress:  

my God; in him will I trust.”

I am loving and kind.  I don’t just tell of my love for people, I do my best to show people that I love them and care for them. I try to have a shoulder for people to lean on. I do my best to express my concern for others situations and the things in life that they are going through. 1 Corinthians 13: 7 (ESV) says;

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,  

endures all things.”  

I am compassionate.  I can feel empathy for people, even if they don’t want it or deserve it in some people’s eye. I don’t want anyone to feel alone.

I also bear tangible gifts, I am an artist.  I love to draw.

I am a  musician: I play the guitar.

I am a blogger: I have been open about my health and life as well as my walk with God and how I believe completely in His word. 2 Timothy 1:8 (ESV) says;

“Therefore, do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord,  

nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by  

the power of God.”

I am a daughter of a King. Not perfect, I make mistakes, but I am a working towards being more and more like my Father every day. John 1: 12 says;

“But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he  

gave the right to become children of God,  13 who were born,  

not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man,  

but of God.”

Who am I?’ I am what God made me to be.

 

Where Have All the Fathers Gone?

As soon as Rhys heard the front door open, he jumped up and began shouting for joy, “Mom Daddy’s home, Daddy’s home!”. His heartbeat racing and his brown eyes shining excitedly, anticipating playtime with Daddy. A wide grin spread across Rhys’s face as Daddy acted like a big bear. Daddy quickly dropping down onto one knee so that he’d be at his son’s height to horse around the living room. Sadly this scene is becoming a rear sight to see.

Today let’s talk about the invisible dads, the ones who don’t marry Mummy, don’t support their kids and don’t hang around for the hugs, kisses and nappy changes. There are millions of them around the world, and their numbers are growing.

“Today, more than one in four births is to an unmarried mother, and more than one in 10 births is to a teenager. These numbers portend a future of fragile families. Once considered primarily a racial problem, fatherless homes have increased across a wide range of demographics over the last ten years.”

How have we come to the point where a child with two parents is the exception rather than the norm? It is time that we put the issue of fatherless families front and center on our national agenda.

So who’s the real problem here? And why should we care?

It is time to shift our attention to the issue of male responsibility, and to the indispensable role that fathers play in our society.

Firstly, it would be an oversimplification to assume that two parents are always better than one as there are many courageous and loving single moms and daddy’s who are able to balance the competing demands on their time and attention, to care and provide for their children alone.

However, contrary to the sentiments of our culture and though our society is only beginning to recognize it, the presence of fathers within the home is vital to the moral integrity of a society. The short-term effects are already far too evident as statistics  reveal that the loss of fathers is reverberating throughout the world in the form of social pathologies ranging from teen pregnancy to drug abuse.

Fatherless children are  five times more likely to be poor and twice as likely to drop out of school as children who live with both parents.

Boys, without proper male role models, look to other sources for the male bonding they need. In the inner cities that often entails gangs while in the suburbs it tends to be online.

“According to the latest statistics, the increase in the proportion of single-parent families accounted for about half of the overall increase in child poverty from 1979 through to 1987.”

The Scriptures warn us about the power of fatherhood, as well as the long-lasting impact that fatherhood has on us all. Exodus 20:4-6.” Fatherlessness is the most harmful demographic trend of this generation

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree

“The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” could be both about habits/behavior and also looks. Have you ever thought about that? Do you often find yourself reacting to a situation the way your father did? or scarier yet…do you ever see your mannerisms in your son? The footprint of a father leaves a permanent mark on the soul of a child.

Fatherhood is under assault

We hear a lot about the war on women…but it is the war on Dads that is causing the greatest damage in the world today. It’s not hard to find. If you watch any popular sitcom on television today, you’ll likely notice that fathers are typically portrayed as childish, irresponsible, lazy, incompetent and stupid.

The doofus dad stereotype isn’t new. There’s Fred Flinstone, and even Charlie Brown’s monotone parents. But according to Tierny, the consistency of these new portrayals has slowly created a new norm opposed to what being a father used to mean.

Dads make a difference. Dads can be heroes – if only we give them the chance. We remain optimistic that family still has more influence than media.

We all need another hero

Fathers are representatives of God on earth; as our heavenly father is the giver of life so also are the earthly father’s givers of life.  Malachi 4:6 says “And he will turn, the hearts of the fathers to the children, And the hearts of the children to their fathers, Lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.”

God understands the importance of a father’s love and cares towards their children and He has set the standard by being the first example of a loving father.

“The SARRI report quotes research which  found that “the presence of a father can  contribute to cognitive development,  intellectual functioning, and school  achievement. Children growing up  without fathers are more likely to experience emotional disturbances and  depression.”

“Girls who grow up with  their fathers are more likely to have  higher self-esteem, lower levels of risky  sexual behaviour, and fewer difficulties  in forming and maintaining romantic  relationships later in life. They have less  likelihood of having an early pregnancy,  bearing children outside marriage,  marrying early, or getting divorced.”

A father’s touch

The first thing, therefore, that a father can do for his children is to love their mother. Another part of a father’s task is that of a protector for his family. But, Daddy also has another task in the home, which is to combine tenderness with strength, and to model the combination so consistently that the children regard the combination as natural.

Our kids must come to know naturally both that dad’s standards protect them, and that his love makes them strong.

Where have all the fathers gone?

Our courts do not value fatherhood as much as motherhood. In 2015 it is still the case that mothers and fathers do not have equal rights

And herein lies the problem. Our expectation of the role a separated father should play in his children’s lives is so low, that when half of dads who win “access” to their kids can’t even sleep under the same roof as their offspring, academics declare this to be an overwhelming success. One of the fruits of the feminist movement many claim is the idea that a woman is more responsible as a parent than the father is.

“He is not my Dad…he is just someone you sleep with!” How many mothers have felt the sting of those words? That is why God hates divorce. We should too.

Our culture has put asunder things which God has joined together—things such as tenderness and strength. It is the job of the father to put them back together again.

Fatherhood, like Motherhood has is its own rewards – as most dads have found. Sadly, for the others, the invisible ones, it is a gift foolishly squandered.

 

As seen on