A young woman has spoken out about how she is pursuing Christ in the face of her struggle with same-sex attraction. As a teenager, Rachel Gilson began feeling attracted to women, and it wasnâ€™t long before she embraced lesbianism.
Although she felt â€œneutralâ€ towards Christianity growing up, as she began to pursue relationships with other girls, she says she became â€œmore opposed to itâ€.
â€˜A big barrierâ€™
â€œI saw it as being for stupid peopleâ€, said Rachel.
But by college, Rachel had become curious about the existence of God, secretly searching for information about Jesus and reading C.S. Lewisâ€™ Mere Christianity.
â€œWhat I read about Jesus online was much more compelling than what Iâ€™d expectedâ€, Rachel said, â€œbut at the same time, my sexuality was a big barrier. I knew that I wanted to marry a woman someday, and I knew that Christianity wasnâ€™t OK with thatâ€.
â€˜God is realâ€™
But one day, while reading, Rachel felt convicted that â€œGod is real, and I am in a lot of trouble. Because not only is he real; he is perfect, and I am incredibly imperfect.â€
She recalled: â€œI understood for the first time that Jesus had come to place himself as a kind of wall between Godâ€™s wrath â€“ his right and fair anger at my sin â€“ and me. I knew that if I trusted in Jesus, I was going to be saved.â€
A student group on her college campus helped Rachel to grow in her faith, giving her a Bible, answering her questions, teaching her how to pray and helping her fight sexual temptation.
She said that while her attractions to women havenâ€™t disappeared since becoming a Christian, she is choosing to put Christ first in her life.
She said, â€œit would definitely be tragic to give up something that valuable for something that is less valuable. And it would also be tragic to pretend like this real part of my life, my sexuality, is less than it is.
â€œBut Jesus is more precious than even that very deep part of me, because of his great love.â€
She said that while her attractions to women havenâ€™t disappeared since becoming a Christian, she is choosing to put Christ first in her life.The Christian Institute, on Rachel Gilson
She concluded: â€œThe reason that most people arenâ€™t Christians is either because they think that Jesus isnâ€™t really real or that he isnâ€™t really worth it. But Jesus is both â€“ really real and really worth it.â€
â€œI gave up some major things and some significant sexual relationships â€“ but God has heaped upon me beautiful and good things in their place.â€